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Otherwise, the way she acted reminded him of… Ber’s muscles went taut with fear.No. No, it can’t be that.Her courses hadn’t restarted, so it was impossible that she’d conceived. He forced himself to relax, though his hand found its way to her stomach as though he had a healer’s power to check.
Not that he would—it would be a waste of energy.
It hadn’t been that long since they’d reunited, and even if she had resumed her courses, the chances were low. They’d slept together for centuries before Speran’s conception. It wouldn’t happen again within a couple of weeks’ time. After all the training sessions they’d had lately, exhaustion was normal.
But hours later, uneasiness followed him into his own rest.
Once again,Tes woke alone in their bed amidst rays of mid-morning sunshine, but it was no longer a surprise. Ber had taken to caring for Speran, giving her time to sleep longer. But unlike usual, she didn’t feel rested. Her eyelids drifted closed as though weighed down by a sorcerer’s spell, and it almost felt like too much effort to move her sore limbs.
Unfortunately, she had too much to do to sleep longer. They had a consultation with Toren and Mehl about possible battle plans, and Ria was altering a set of armor for Tes to wear during the coming battle. That project had taken longer than expected, since Ria was accustomed to using her magic on cloth, not metal.This would be the first time in a week that Tes got to see the progress.
With that in mind, she pried herself from the bed, bathed, and dressed, but as she tightened the laces at the back of her gown, the pain from the tight bodice reminded her of another errand. Her breasts remained the same size and their sensitivity hadn’t decreased, even though she hadn’t nursed in well over a week. It was time to check in with the healer.
Mery’s rooms were close now that she’d been appointed the royal healer, so it was only a few minutes after Tes’s request that the woman bustled in with a cheerful greeting. Though it was nothing unusual since they’d gotten to know each other well over the past year, Tes’s throat tightened around any return words. What was the matter with her?
Shaking the feeling aside, she led the healer over to the nearby chairs. “This should be brief, but please feel free to sit.”
Instead, Mery’s eyes narrowed. “Something is wrong.”
“No.” Tes sighed and faced the healer more fully. “But I’m oddly nervous about my question.”
“Would it be easier to ask by missive?”
From the healer’s calm, steady voice, Tes had to assume that her skittishness wasn’t unusual. In this case, though, the offered solution would take too long. So she lifted her shoulders, straightened her spine, and met Mery’s gaze. “Is there a way to make my milk dry up faster? This pain and heaviness will be terribly distracting while I’m fighting.”
The healer relaxed. “Is that all? Sit down, and I’ll see what I can do.”
Tes took one of the nearest seats, and Mery circled around to stand behind her. But as the healer’s hands rested on her shoulders, Tes found herself wrinkling the fabric of her skirts in a tight, clammy hold. Much as it had the night before, dread filled her, making the healer’s light touch feel like the weight oftwo boulders. Even the soothing rush of energy didn’t ease the terrible sensation.
Forever must have passed before Mery sucked in a breath. “Your…your milk has mostly dried. I’ll stop it completely, but I’m afraid it won’t help.”
More of Tes’s skirt fell victim to her harsh grip. “Why?”
“Well…” The healer’s voice trailed into a silence so profound that the whole world must have surely been frozen by it. “Tes. Your Highness. Your breasts still hurt because you’re pregnant.”
And with those words, that frozen world shattered.
Chapter 48
Secret
Tes jerked to her feet, her palms pressed hard against her breastbone. “That’s impossible.”
Mery lifted a brow. “You’ve been chaste, then?”
“Ah…” Obviously, she hadn’t been. She and Ber were both passionate people, and since the chances of conception had been so low, they’d continued as usual. “No, but I couldn’t get pregnant while nursing, and my courses haven’t restarted since I quit.”
“I’m afraid it’s a myth that you can’t conceive while nursing.” The healer grimaced. “You’re not the first it’s happened to.”
Licking her suddenly dry lips, Tes shook her head. “It hasn’t been that long.”
“It’s been at least a couple of weeks since you first went back to Centoi to confront your husband.”
Heat scalded her cheeks. The healer must have guessed what had happened after Tes had discovered her link with Ber. At least few people knew that she’d first traveled to Centoi to kill her husband, for it would soon be obvious that she’d created a new life with him, instead.
A beautiful, fragile, potentially disastrous life.
Her heart squeezed at the awful thought, and she cupped her stomach with a trembling hand.No, I’ll not regret any child of mine, not as my parents regretted me.Yet even with such resolve, her breath came in short gasps, and her head spun from the fear of it all. Gods. What kind of cruel trick of fate was this? Not only would she have to risk her baby in battle, but their family would be deprived of yet another should-be-joyous moment.
