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Somehow, he understood, slipping his arms from beneath her knees so he could brace himself above her.Yes.Tes wrapped her legs around his waist and tilted her hips higher to meet his thrusts. He groaned, then gave her breast a teasing nip before devouring her mouth.
Her nails dug into his shoulders as she climbed once again. But not alone. She could sense it now, that ragged thread of a link they’d somehow made. As the fire claimed them both, she let herself open, and at once, she knew he was right.
A knot like this would always stay bound.
Chapter 21
Armor
Ber relished the feel of Tes nestled against him, her back against his chest. With her head pillowed against his arm and her warmth seeping through him, he could finally breathe. This was how they should be. Always. He would be happy for the kingdom to crash into ruin around them if it gave him a few extra moments to rest here with her.
In the dim blue light, he could barely make out the bruise at the top of her shoulder. He should have at least considered feeling regret for marking her, but it wasn’t worth the effort. No matter how long he thought about it, he would summon no chagrin. After all, if it bothered her, she could hide it with a glamour.
But they would both know it was there.
Smiling, he traced circles over her stomach with his finger. “Sleeping, love?”
“Not really,” she said. “Not here, though you’ve certainly distracted away much of my fear.”
He froze, his teasing finger coming to a halt just beneath her belly button. How could he have forgotten how difficult this place was for her? “We should tear out this alcove entirely. It’s a wretched place, and I’ll not have you—”
“No.” Her hand wrapped around his and squeezed. “I won’t say Ilovethe place now, but itiswhere we completed our link. Perhaps someday, we can alter it to better match that happy event.”
Longing stole his breath, for if he could, he would improve the space for her now. Had he more magic, he could have done something. Anything. Create new bedcovers, perhaps, or finish the rough stone walls with paneling. Instead, he couldn’t even spare enough energy to cast a mage light. His tiny bit of power was bound up in the alerting spells he’d placed on the doors to his room and to the secret passages.
“Ber?” She half-turned to look at him. “Was itnota happy event for you?”
His brows drew together. “Of course it was. Why?”
“Because I can feel your turmoil like my own heartbeat. What’s wrong?”
“Ah.” He squirmed against her and swallowed hard before he could manage the confession. “I wish I was a better mage for you. If I had my brother’s strength, I could create us a haven here. But I have little to offer in that regard.”
“Raw power isn’t any more of a boon. Toren can’t use his magic without risking others, so in practice, there isn’t a difference. It’s a useless comparison” She snorted. “I swear, the closer I become to your brother, the more I realize just how alike you two are.”
Bitter pain sliced into his heart, and Ber sucked in a breath from the sudden force of it. For almost a year, his brother had been able to see her every day. Every night. Growing closer, it seemed. Jealousy—unreasonable, choking jealousy—nearly overcame him. He cleared his throat against the burn.
“I’m not sure I like that comparison while you’re naked in my arms,” he muttered.
“Are you honestly…?” Tes bit out a curse, her grip tightening on his hand until his palm pressed into her waist. “I know you didn’t intend to accuse me of sleeping with your brother. Because if youhadmade such an accusation, I would need to reconsider my vow not to kill you.”
He grimaced. Of course, he didn’t believe she would have done that. Nor would Toren, for that matter. But no matter how much Ber had come to terms with his own inadequacies, there was a small corner of his heart that refused to accept that he deserved as much as his brother received. Ber had often been called Toren’s shadow twin, and everyone knew that shadows were merely the deflection of light.
At the choked sound Tes made, he realized how long he’d let the silence stretch. “I’m sorry, my heart. I know you wouldn’t. It was my own—”
“Hush.” She turned over to face him. “Thanks to our link, I caught the edge of that thought. Is that truly what you believe of yourself?” He couldn’t bring himself to reply, but her sharp gasp suggested she’d picked up on his assent anyway. “Ber. It wasn’t just love and honor behind your previous resolve to die for me, was it? You consider yourself my shadow, too. Expendable. Ephemeral. Truly unworthy.”
It sounded a little foolish—and uncomfortably close to pitiful—when she pointed it out so bluntly. “I’m a protector,” he tried to explain. “One so far in the background that I can easily fade away when the task is done. Like Toren, you have a destined role, one you’re suited to. When haveIever had any purpose or place, other than as a support?”
She should know better than anyone how well he belonged in such a role. He’d been the one to teach her how to hide, after all. But instead of agreeing, she let out a scoffing curse and flicked her hand. Three mage lights spun into the air abovethem, brightening the room with such abruptness that he had to squeeze his eyes closed.
“You should preserve your energy,” Ber muttered. “So you can escape back to Llyalia. Isn’t that why you were suffering in the dark instead of relieving your fear with magic?”
“I had to worry about catching your notice then. Besides, my power is mine to use how I wish,” she replied, her tone chilling with an imperious frost. “And I wish to show you how silly you’re being. You have not disappeared in the clear light despite all assertions to the contrary. I suppose you’re not a shadow at all.”
His heart warmed—with love and with awe—even as he fought the urge to duck his head. She’d always had a way of deflating his foolishness, and in this case, she was obviously right. He was as solid and real as anyone, even when he felt like a ghost.
He blinked his eyes open, ready to tell her so, but her expression took him aback. There’d been more fury than he’d realized behind that regal tone. “Why are you so angry?”
