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‘I met him too, back at the château.’
Arrosa couldn’t bring herself to ask what Clem thought of Jack. ‘He’s right, you know. If we tried to control this thing by saying we were in a relationship, by trying out being in a relationship, it would just confuse the girls, and that’s the last thing they need. He wants them to have stability and I support that, I always have.’
‘He’s obviously a great dad. I have to admit it, I got him wrong. He’s not the overbearing tycoon I expected but, from what you and Sally say and the little I’ve seen, he seems a surprisingly kind man. A principled man who I would guess is also clearly head over heels about you and I know you feel the same way. So what I don’t understand is why you are both so sure that you have no future.’
‘He doesn’t want the kind of life I lead, Clem, not for him, not for his girls, and I don’t blame him.’
Clem sipped her wine and sat back, her expression thoughtful. ‘Rosy, is your life really so bad? I know it got a little overwhelming recently, but I would say that Asturia allows its high-profile people more privacy than many other countries, and the world’s press will get bored with this story eventually. I’m not saying that if you gave it another go the first few weeks and months wouldn’t be a challenge, but after that I think you could build a pretty decent life here. I should know! It’s easier for me in some ways, my education included handling publicity, I know how to work the camera, speak in palatable soundbites and ensure my social media is squeaky clean and, yes, I admit I’ve still been overwhelmed. But there’s been beauty amongst the madness and I’m seeing my way to a future, the opportunities my position gives me. That could be true for Jack as well.’
How Rosy wished her sister was right.
‘But you wanted to be part of the family, Jack doesn’t. He has some past experiences which make him shy away from publicity, from high profile relationships. He thinks we’re better denying everything, using his investment in the theatre as a pretext for our friendship. I owe him that, Clem.’
‘The theatre?’
‘I haven’t really had a chance to discuss it with you, but I think you will love what he has in mind, that Simone would have too. If we say that we were working together on the theatre in memory of your mother, that gives me a reason to have spent the summer in Cornwall and to have been seen with Jack. And in the end Polhallow will have the kind of theatre Simone would have been proud of. It all makes sense.’
But Arrosa knew she was trying to convince herself as well as her sister, was trying not to think about how differently she could have played the morning’s conversation. Because absence really had made her heart grow fonder. The moment Jack had walked through the door her home had felt complete.
She’d known what he was thinking, could have sworn that her heart beat in time with his, and she knew that if she’d just reached out, had just touched him, that everything would be different and he would be hers, for now at least.
But she wanted him to come to her because that was where he wanted to be, not seduced into intimacy. The theatre was a worthy project. It gave them an angle. It was a memorial, and these were all good things. Just because her whole being ached with sadness and loss didn’t change any of those things.
‘Look,’ Clem said, putting her glass down. ‘Whatever you decide I will support, I hope you know that. But if having Jack in your life is what you want, and if having Jack by your side makes your difficult role an iota easier, then you should fight for that, Rosy. You have always done what’s right, you always put other people first. Maybe now is the time to concentrate on you. I believe you deserve someone by your side who sees how special you are. If that person is Jack then don’t let him walk away because he doesn’t understand your life. Show him how he fits in. Show him that your life has magic as well as duty. I get how he feels. I didn’t want to stay here as Akil’s mysterious English lover. I had to figure out how I could be here as me and I found that. But I didn’t find it alone—Akil helped me. You don’t have to do this alone either, nor does Jack. Just promise me you’ll think about it.’
Arrosa blinked, her eyes hot and heavy with tears she refused to shed. Was it simply as easy as deciding she wanted Jack in her life? How could it be?
‘I’ll think about it. Thank you, Clem.’
Her sister smiled affectionately. ‘What are sisters for?’
Over the next ten days Arrosa did more than think. Instead of hiding away from Jack and the girls she made time in her hectic schedule to show Jack exactly what made her country so special and why she loved it so much. The girls were usually busy during her pockets of free time, once, to her amazement, with her parents, who had never been the kind to spend time with children before. She suspected Clem of making sure Jack was on his own when she was able to join him, but her sister denied the charge with an innocent look that didn’t fool Arrosa one jot. But she wasn’t complaining because, whatever the reason behind Tansy and Clover’s busy schedule, it left her free to smuggle Jack out with her bodyguard, Henri’s, help to show him the country she loved and the work that was needed to bring it properly into the twenty-first century. Just as she’d hoped, Jack was soon filled with enthusiasm and ideas for how things could be improved.
They weren’t long excursions, just a few hours here and there, never a full day, although there was some time in every day, but in those moments she was the perfect blend of Arrosa and Rosy, princess and person, and she could feel herself falling harder and harder for Jack. But although he seemed to enjoy their time together, there was still a chasm between them. They didn’t touch, and never alluded to any kind of future together. It was as much torture as it was joy. It was all she had.
She walked into the house late one afternoon, looking for Clem, who was getting ready for the ball at the British Embassy. She found her sister in her room, putting the last touches to her hair and make-up, a stunning red floor-length cocktail dress hanging ready.
Arrosa whistled in appreciation. ‘You look amazing.’
‘Thank you. It feels odd to be there as an Asturian representative.’
‘You’ll be brilliant.’
Clem sucked in a breath. ‘I’m glad I persuaded Sally to come, she deserves some fun and I could do with the backup. How was your day?’
‘Good. I spent the morning going over my speech for the day after tomorrow and in meetings then I took Jack on my favourite mountain walk. I needed the exercise. You know, even though it’s still quite warm, I can feel winter in the air. Those trails will be under snow within a month.’
It had been a lovely walk but sometimes Arrosa wondered what she and Jack were doing. They seemed no further forward. If anything, they seemed to be slipping away from each other every time they spent a polite, distanced time together.
Clem swivelled round on her stool. ‘It’s been over a week, Rosy. Have you told Jack how you feel yet?’
‘I...’
‘Told him that you love him?’ her sister went on remorselessly.
Arrosa stared at her and swallowed. ‘Love? I...’ But she’d stopped lying to herself a long time ago, she wouldn’t lie to her sister. ‘I’ve told him that I like him, Clem, he knows how much I fancy him...’Fancy. Such a trite word to describe the depth of longing she felt whenever he was near. ‘I think we both know that it might have been love if things were different but, after all, we’ve not really known each other that long.’
‘About as long as I’ve known Akil,’ her sister reminded her.
