Page 53 of If We Say Goodbye


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I jump, whipping back around. He’s too close. I should put more distance between us, but my feet are glued to the floor.

“I’m not hiding,” I stammer.

“Are you sure? Because if you weren’t hiding,” he points behind him, “what was that?”

“I said to pretend like nothing happened.”

He blushes. “I don’t think I can do that.”

Oh, boy.

What did I do? What happened to not leading him on?

“I need to go eat,” I say.

“I’ll go with you—”

“No.” I shake my head. A nervous laugh spills out of me. “I’m heading to Mr. Rodriguez’s class because I have some questions for him, so you should probably go back to the cafeteria.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to eat alone.”

I catch my breath. “I’m sure.”

His gaze falls to the ground in disappointment. “Okay. Well, I’ll see you after school, right?”

“Mhm,” I say as I move further away from him.

“Oh, wait,” he says, looking up again. I pause. “I have to make a stop on the way home. Is that okay?”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” I say.

He laughs, looking down at my tray of food. “No chip sandwich today?”

“We’re out of jelly.”

“What a shame.”

“You laugh, but it’s good.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

“As you should,” I say. Then, I round the corner.

My hand is still pulsing. I shake it out, but the feeling won’t leave. I pick up my pace before he has a chance to say anything else.

* * *

After school,we drive to the elementary school without saying much. My mortified brain is still computing what I did at lunch.

Jordy stands in front of the school with his shoulders slumped forward.

As soon as we pull up, he climbs into the backseat without any sort of greeting. He rests his head against the door and closes his eyes. Caleb’s jaw locks watching him, but he doesn’t say anything.

Part of me wonders if I should say something, but I don’t want to make Jordy more upset. I would hate to say something that would send him into an attack.

We drive in silence until Caleb parks the car on the main street of town in front of a music store. It’s an older building with paint that’s flaking, and the logo is something out of a 1970s catalog.

“I won’t be long. Do you want to come in?” he asks.

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