Page 52 of If We Say Goodbye


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I try to suppress my little smile. “Goodnight.”

When we hang up, I realize despite my initial apprehension, it’s becoming more and more clear that Caleb is easy to talk to.

And no matter how much I don’t want to admit it, I might be starting to enjoy talking to him.

CHAPTERFOURTEEN

For the first time,my class goes by too fast, and I can’t focus. My concentration is consumed by the idea of seeing Sadie again. I know I have to talk about our next tutoring session eventually, but I’m not in the mood to do it now. She texted me this morning, and I didn’t respond. I couldn’t think of an excuse.

As soon as our class is dismissed, I race out, hoping I can make it to my locker and then to the cafeteria before Sadie sees me.

I burst into the cafeteria while the tables are mostly empty, and she’s nowhere to be seen. I still look over my shoulder every few seconds, nervous she’ll appear out of thin air any second.

Today, our lunch options are either chicken tenders or meatball subs. I don’t even have to think about which line I belong in. The marina sauce always soaks the sub bread and makes it soggy, and that’s not the kind of negativity I need in my life right now.

As the fifth person in line, I get my pick of chicken tenders, which I wholeheartedly believe I deserve after the last few lunches I’ve had. There’s a counter full of paper boats with three tenders in each. Steam floats above them, making my mouth water.

I pluck the one that has, in my opinion, the best three and transfer it to my tray. Then, under the watchful eye of the lunch lady, and with a timid smile, I place a mushy side of broccoli next to it.

All I have to do now is pay. Then I can sneak away to the art room and eat in there. Mr. Rodrigez always leaves the classroom open for kids that want to work on their projects during the lunch period. Even though I don’t have any intention of working on my project, it’s the perfect excuse to escape the cafeteria. It’s quiet in there, and I’ll be left alone.

I pay and jump ahead. Still with no Sadie in sight, I step into the hallway.

“There you are,” Caleb says, jogging to catch up to me as I pass the gym doors.

I spin around, slowing down. “What are you doing?”

He smiles. “I was going to sit with you.”

My vision shifts. Behind him, Sadie steps into the hallway.

Goosebumps ripple up my arms and my heart speeds up. I grab Caleb’s arm and pull him into the gym, tugging him behind the bleachers.

“What’s—”

I shove my free hand over his mouth, pushing him against the wall. “Be quiet.”

His eyes grow big and lock onto mine, silently asking a million questions.

My jaw lowers in slow motion as I realize what I’m doing. I hate it when people touch me and yet, my hand is over his lips.

His lips.

Every time he breathes, it tickles my skin shooting pulses through my hand. Slowly, he covers my wrist with a light touch, pulling me away from his face.

I stagger back. “Sorry, I—has anybody ever told you that you talk too much?” I rub the back of my neck and cringe. “I just needed you to stop talking.”

He nods, eyes still the size of saucers.

The silence grows thick, making my stomach turn.

Why did I do that? I’m hyper aware of my personal space. I never cross the line into someone else’s.

My face burns, and my throat goes dry. I try to clear it, but it doesn’t do much good. My voice still squeaks when I speak. “Let’s pretend that didn’t happen.” I shuffle out of the darkness behind the bleachers and peek into the hallway.

Sadie is gone.

“Who are we hiding from?” Caleb whispers, towering over me from behind.

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