Page 70 of If We Say Goodbye


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Barreling through the door, I march straight up to Caleb’s car.

His hand lands on my shoulder, slowing me down. “Tell me what’s wrong. Please.”

I practically shove his hand away. “Don’t touch me.”

He takes a step back, holding his hands up in surrender. “Okay, I won’t, but please talk to me.”

I take in a ragged breath. Dad was my lifeline at home, but he’s deserted me. He’s making it very clear that everything else is more important than me. “No. Just drive me home.”

“Holding all this in isn’t good for you,” he says.

I scoff. “What do you know? You spend all this time doting on me, and for what? You say you want to help me, but why? Who made that your job?” He opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, but I cut him off. “I don’t need you to fix me. All I need you to do is drive me to school. That’s the only reason I’m doing these ridiculous dates in the first place.”

All I want is to graduate and leave my rotten life behind.

Caleb trudges toward the driver’s door. “Fine. If that’s really what you want.”

I scramble inside the car as he opens the glove compartment and pulls out our contract. In one swift move, he rips it in two, letting the pieces fall in front of me. “I know you weren’t interested in me, but I really thought we could be friends.” His gaze falters. “I’m done being treated like garbage. I’ll drive you back home, but . . . this is the last time.”

My jaw drops. “What do you mean this is the last time? How am I supposed to get to school?”

He shrugs as he starts to drive away. “I’m sure you’ll find another way. Download an app; pay a driver. At least that way you don’t have to go on any more ridiculous dates.”

My head sways. I feel like I’m lost at sea, and I tug at my sleeves to keep myself grounded. My chest becomes tight, and I have to focus on my breathing to keep it steady. “That’s not fair.”

He laughs, but it isn’t his normal laugh. It’s cold and devoid of amusement. “Not fair? You don’t want to keep up your end of the deal, so why should I?”

The drumming of my heart pounds in my ears, and shivers ripple up my hands. The car starts to close in on me, crushing me without a single touch. Closer and closer, the walls close in around me. I can’t breathe. “Stop the car,” I whisper.

“Why?”

“I’ll walk home,” I say.

“I’m not going to make you do that. It’ll take you at least an hour to walk home from here,” he says, stepping on the gas.

My skin crawls as the car accelerates. Every sound amplifies. The tires on the pavement. The trees swinging in the wind. The birds flying overhead. The fabric of my collar cinches around my throat, and the seat belt cuts into my chest.

“Stop the car!” I scream.

Caleb slams on the brakes.

We lurch forward.

“Are you crazy?” he says, panting from breathing in too much.

I unbuckle.

My heart is racing a million miles a second. “I’m walking home.” I open my door and find the ground with my wobbly legs. I almost stumble, but I don’t want him to see me fall.

“Bec, wait,” Caleb says, reaching out for me, but stops before he gets too close.

“Go.”

“I’m not leaving you here like this.”

“I’m not a child. I don’t need you treating me like one. Now, get lost.” I slam the door closed and step onto the sidewalk.

There’s a torn expression in his eyes, but eventually, he drives away.

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