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“You can’t blame us for wanting time alone together.” Valor wrapped a possessive arm around her. “You have time alone with each of us, but we never get to see each other.”
“Not seeing each other is a decision the two of you made that has nothing to do with me. I’m the one who pointed out that neither of you was making your relationship a priority.”
“We’re trying to fix that,” Valor growled.
“You could’ve told me that was the plan. Maybe I would have left you alone.”
“Would you though? Really?” He and I stared each other down.
“No,” I admitted, “but maybe I wouldn’t have interrupted. I could have just watched.”
“Why would you need to be here at all?”
I blinked at him. “Where else would I be?”
“I don’t know. Living your own life and not trying to force your way into ours?”
The words stung, but I managed not to flinch.
“Valor! Don’t be mean.” Tarryn’s tone was full of reproach.
“Am I only a sex toy to you?” I didn’t want to know the answer, so why had I asked? It was the question that had been burning in my mind since I’d discovered they were both gone.
“Of course not,” Tarryn said, looking horrified. She glanced up at Valor, waiting for his answer, the way I was. His face was rapidly going from pink to red.
“I—it’s complicated.” He rubbed at the back of his neck. “The sex is… But I’m not bisexual, and I love my wife.” He looked genuinely torn, rather than mocking or dismissive.
“Are you happy to see me when I show up?”
“You’re a menace, and you turn my life upside down!”
“You like it,” I accused.
He tucked his cock back into his pants and zipped them up, as though he’d suddenly realized his dick was out. “Why would I like all this chaos?”
“You miss me when I’m not around.”
He shrugged, looking uncomfortable. “Sometimes.”
“I’m not interested in being a sex toy for the rest of my life,” I said firmly. “I’m not a dildo. If you’re not willing to include me as a full partner in this relationship...” The threat died before I could say I would end things with them. I felt my nostrils flare as I tried to contain my distress. He was going to refuse, but it was time for honesty.
I could feel Tarryn’s gaze on me, but I couldn’t look her way, or I’d cave and accept whatever relationship crumbs Valor was willing to offer.
“You can’t expect to have equal footing right away,” Valor protested. “Tarryn and I have been together for years.”
“I understand that.”
“Then what are you asking for?”
I sighed, not sure how to explain. “I chase after the two of you, expressing the violence of my affection…but you treat me like I’m ridiculous.” I stopped because I was making a mess of this, and my voice was shaking. “Okay, objectively, I know I’m ridiculous, but if you don’t like me despite it or maybe because of it?” I shook my head. “Either you let me in, or I’m out. I’ve spent my entire life trying to find people to belong to. If it’s not the two of you, I need to know now, before the suspense kills me.”
Valor sat down on the bed and pulled Tarryn into his lap.
“We were talking about you at dinner,” Tarryn admitted.
I was sure they had been. It was probably why they’d been laughing so much. Pressing my lips together, I nodded at her to go on.
“We never meant to make you feel used.”
