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Wasn’t he?
Adrian swallowed, suddenly aware of how chilly it was down here. “You’re taking the piss.”
Martin’s mouth twisted into a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “And why the fuck would I do that?”
“I…” Adrian drew a blank.No. “But you never said a word.”
“Because I wanted you as a lover, but Ineededyou as a friend. You weren’t in love with me—trust me, I looked.” Shadows swirled through Martin’s eyes before he shrugged his shoulders, a weak upwards tilt to his lips. “And I wasn’t about to risk our friendship.”
Mum and Dad had known. The thought flared up like a firecracker—all those times they’d encouraged a sunset walk, a bottle of wine by the fire, or a day by the lake? They’d known, and Adrian had laughed it off as them being silly and sentimental. Martin had too, and only hindsight made Adrian wonder whether there’d been cues that he’d missed.
Fuck. He was an idiot.
“I’m sorry.” He bit the inside of his cheek, stealing a quick glance at Martin’s face. “I should have noticed.”
“You weren’t meant to.” Martin’s voice was even, devoid of reproach.
“Then why tell me now?”
“Because I’m trying to make a point.” Martin crossed his arms, chin tipped up at a stubborn angle. “Which is that I didn’t fall for a pretty face and a nice body. I fell foryou. I know you’ve been told since, like, eighteen or whenever the boss found you that it’s your looks that sell, but that’s not true. I knew you then and I know you now—and you deservesomeone who sees behind the pretty facade and falls for you. Because you’re fucking worth it.”
The L’Oréal quip sat at the tip of Adrian’s tongue. He swallowed it because Christ, not the bloody moment for it.
“You’re not still…” He trailed off—just couldn’t think of a good way to finish that sentence. It took effort to meet Martin’s eyes. Oh God, this sucked.
“No.” Plain and simple, no hesitation in Martin’s tone. Adrian exhaled.
“Good.” Shit, that was insensitive, wasn’t it? “I mean,” he rushed to add, “not good as in, you know—good. But, like … good. Because Matteo. And—with Eric, and all.” He didn’t have a fucking clue what he was trying to say, but it did the job because Martin laughed, short and abrupt.
“Don’t get your tongue in a twist, mate. It’s still us, okay?” He shook his head, stance easing along with the line of his shoulders. “But I think there’s only so long unrequited love can live before iteither burns out or turns unhealthy. I love you, man. You’re my family—you and your parents. But Matteo is my guy.”
Relief washed over Adrian and left him briefly light-headed. “I love you too. You know that, right?”
“As you should.” A proper smile underlined the statement, faint lines radiating out from the corners of Martin’s eyes. “But let’s get back to my original point, yeah? Though I gotta say, I’ve felt more comfortable having my arse filmed in high definition than I did during this emotional striptease just now.”
It was soMartinthat the last dregs of heaviness in Adrian’s stomach dissipated. He grinned. “Want me to get out my phone? Whatever puts you at ease.”
Predictably, Martin wasted no time in turning around and dropping his jeans along with his boxer briefs, wiggling his arse for good measure. Laughing, Adrian ducked down to smack a kiss to it—stillthem, the spectre of losing this ease slipping away.
“Jesus, it’s cold down here. Don’t think I could get it up if you paid me.” With an exaggerated shiver, Martin pulled his jeans back up before he turned and smiled at Adrian. “Now, anyway. The point of all this? Eric.”
Adrian inhaled around the flutter in his chest. “You think he could be my Matteo.”
“Do you want him to stay?” Martin asked.
Adrian felt his eyes dart away, breath catching in his throat. Fuck. Eric was… He’d leave, wouldn’t he? His life was in London.
But that hadn’t been Martin’s question.
What didAdrianwant?
Daily lines and sleep-warm skin, a sheepish smile coupled with sparks of wit and an ability to listen as though Adrian was the only person in the world. The grand piano in the dining room, brought to life while guests relaxed in the common area. Morning runs and shared showers, the way Eric turned into Adrian’s touch like it was second nature.
Adrian wrapped an arm around his middle. “Yeah. I do want him to stay.”
“I thought so.” Martin paused. “Is he the last guy you want to wake up with?”
Oh.
