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37
RAE
He tasteslike the bitter tang of alcohol softened by the sweet warmth of whiskey hidden beneath the surprising burst of berry-flavored gum. I get each flavor on its own as I test his lips, then all at once when Digger leans in and deepens the connection. His kisses are slow, reverent, and curious. Hungry when he slips his tongue along the seam of my lips, testing my intention.
I angle my head and answer his question.
My fingers feel at home in his choppy hair, burrowing through the lengths as he places his palms against my lower back, pulling me closer.
Everything about this is wrong.
I jerk back at the thought, reality a slap of cold water to the senses. "No. Not yet.”
The pinch of his brow is all he manages as he leans back on his heels, hands resting on his thighs.
"Maddie—“
"Is a fucking full-grown woman who can either understand what this is or mind her own fuckin' business."
"That's not fair, Weston."He hesitates at my use of his real name as though the sound from my lips is unexpected. Startling. "You're her uncle. I'm her friend. If she isn't comfortable with this, what right do I have to selfishly force my will on her?"
"As much right as she did bringing you here. She knew the risks."
"That I'd be hurt by Connor or worse. Sure." I move around him, sliding off the couch to pace across the room. "Not that I'd start... this." I need to expel the pent-up energy. Both from the frustration of Tyke's reaction and the confusion of Digger's.
“Talk to me, Rae.” He rises behind me, his commanding energy sucking the air from the room. “What’s got you scared?”
"You." I spin and face the conundrum. “What if I end up hurting you like I did with Tyke?”
“Why? You got feelings for my brother?” The challenge is there in the slight narrowing of his eye, but his tone invites honesty.
So, I lay it out cold for him. “Yeah. I do.”
From the moment he strode across that yard, hollering at Maddie for screwing up her date, I caved. One look at the broad-shouldered man who wore his love for her like a favorite old sweater, and I wanted some of that devotion for myself. I wanted to know what it would be like to be coveted by a man as hard-edged and brutal as he is.
And then I met his brother. The man who’s intensity makes it hard to breathe even now while he patiently waits for me to say more. All I’ve had from Digger is unrivaled concern and compassion for my position in this shitshow. He placed me on a damn pedestal the second I walked downstairs in the middle of the night and found him highlighted by the lick of flame across charred wood, and he hasn’t taken me off yet.
He doesn’t want to.
Worshipping me is his purpose in life, and that’s what scares me most. What if I don’t measure up to his expectations? What if he comes to regret the time that he spends on me?
“Whatever’s brewin’ behind those eyes, Rae, pop a lid on it.” Digger takes a step closer, creeping up on where I stand, fidgeting with a metal motorbike no bigger than the palm of my hand. “You want me to give you time so you can explore how you feel about my brother? I’ll do that. Will I like it? Nope. Will that stop me respectin’ your wishes? Also, no.”
“I don’t know what I want,” I cry, spinning to find him less than an arm's length away. “How can either of you trust what you feel for me, Digger? I’m new. Interesting. I'm something different to look at." My words soften as my gaze falls, stuck on the toes of his boots, so close to my feet. "I understand, Digger, and I don't hold that against you. I just..." What? Don't want to be used again? Want reassurance that I’ll be more than a passing phase?
"You think I'd take the risk if I didn't think you mean something to me?" He ducks his head, attempting to find my eye.
I turn my head. "Whatdoyou risk?"
His gaze is fire when I face up to the man. "It's not what I risk alone," he explains. "It’s what the club risks, too.” Digger sighs, hand drawn over his face as he half turns away with the other hand to his hip. "You're here because you know shit that could put Terry Creed behind bars for decades, if not the rest of his life," he levels. "I ain't gonna deny that. There's no other reason why we'd even entertain the idea of keeping you on-site when it could start a war. I won't lie, Rae." He turns his head, gaze pained. "If your ex had been anyone other than Connor Creed, you would have been back down that road with a fucking reminder to get your shit in line before you let another man in your bed. But it wasn't, and so you ain't. You're here. With us."
"But that became a problem in and of itself, didn’t it?" I reach behind myself, bracing my weight on my palms atop Tyke's desk.
"Yeah." He takes a step closer. "It did because, like we just talked about, it ain't just us who’s interested in you now.” He leans in, hands flat outside mine, nose an inch from my face. “Let me tell you this, Rae. Between the night I first brought you back here, and now, something changed.”
“It did?” My stomach flips, skin fire.
“For Tyke and me, Terry became the cherry on top.Youbecame the main objective.” Digger's jaw clenches tight, nostrils flaring as he ducks his head and stares at the floor, seemingly attempting to gather himself. "You gotta pick, Rae. Me or him. Who do you want?"
