AllFreeNovel
Share Us
"Thanks, a mil," I say, stepping back. "Have a nice evening."
"You too." He says and closes the door.
I jog back across the street to my home and when I am inside, I take out my phone to message her.
Me: Hi, are you ok? Is something wrong?
I see her coming online and my message is marked as being read by her, then she goes offline again. I wait a few more moments but she does not reply.
I slide the phone back into my pocket and return to the party. I can't stop thinking about her though and feel distracted when my friends are talking to me.
Every now and then I take my phone out of my pocket to check if maybe I did not hear it go off - in case she has replied. But there is no reply and I do not see her online again.
That night I go to bed confused. I hope she is ok. At least I know her brother is with her, so she has someone there for her if she needs something.
CHAPTER 13
GABI
Ican't believe he treated me like I wasjust a neighbor.I mean he hardly spoke to me. I do not understand at all. Is he embarrassed of me? I guess the truth is that I really am just some kind of side fling to him. I felt too embarrassed standing there, so stupid. Why would he even invite me if I am an embarrassment to him? I can't believe he did that.
I slam my kitchen cupboard a little too hard. It has been four days since the party, and I am still very upset, still anxious about it, and still feeling hurt. He has been trying to call me and I have just been ignoring the calls. There is not much he can really say. He said it all with his actions at the party and it really is true - actions do speak louder than words.
I guess it is time for me to accept it is not going to happen. It was not what I thought it was; it was just a fling. I mean I should have known when he told me about how much he loved his wife and how he has not met anyone like her.
I pick up my coffee and walk toward my little breakfast table. Spread across it are my admin papers which I have been trying to convince myself to work through for the past two days. I thought it would be distracting enough to get my mind off Alex, but that was silly of me. I need something bigger. Like my brother's wedding.
I have volunteered to help in quite a few sections of the wedding, even though to be honest it hurts a little to see them so happy and feel like I might never experience that. I am so happy for them though. When he arrived unannounced on the night of the party just after I got home, I was almost in tears but had to hide it from them because they came to tell me the really fantastic news. He had proposed to her that afternoon up in the forest at a little picnic he set up as a surprise. It sounds so sweet. So romantic. I am really excited to be a part of it. I just wish I was not so distracted with these constant thoughts of Alex.
My phone beeps. It is Alex again.
Alex: Good morning, please can we talk?
I put the phone face down on the table. I don't know what to say to him. Do I just ask him bluntly why he treated me like nothing? I don't want to start a fight. I don't want to sound desperate. I have clearly misread the entire situation from the start. Or perhaps I was just blind to the obvious. Is there even any point in talking to him - opening a dialogue that just confirms what I think I already know? Opening a conversation for him to have to awkwardly tell me he is not interested and for me to feel rejected and hurt. Or he might invite me over for some private time and then I will just end up feeling used at the end of the day.
It is not a conversation I am ready for, and I have somehow convinced myself that not saying anything at all is the better option. The easier option. Although it does not feel easy, it feels heavy, confusing, and painful.
I start gathering up the admin papers and putting them back into the folder. I give up on them. I need to accept that I am not in the right frame of mind for paperwork. I would rather go and help choose the flower arrangements today for the wedding.
Finishing my coffee I take a deep breath, close my eyes for a moment, and tell myself to get a grip. Sometimes things are not what they seem and sometimes what you thought might be love is simply - not.
I will accept that and move on with my life.
No matter how difficult it is. I don't want to get hurt. Actually, I don't want to get anymorehurt than I already am.
I don't really have a choice, do I? You can't force someone to like you.
I wipe a single tear away from my cheek and close my eyes to block any more from falling.
It's not meant to be, Gabi.
I message my brother to ask him what time they are headed to the flower shop. He tells me that they will be there in an hour and after that, they are headed through to the bakery for cake tasting. That sounds like fun. Cake always makes people feel better.
Throwing on a pair of jeans and a crop top to fight the hot summery weather I head out to meet my family. My classes are all covered for this week. I just can't face them, and I have too much to do with my family so I had two other trainers split the classes between themselves so that I could have some time off.
Rafael and Lita, his fiancée, are waiting for me at the flower shop with my parents. They all look so happy.
The flower options are absolutely magnificent. Lita is very drawn to the white lilies and wants to mix them with giant yellow sunflowers. Personally, I find myself drawn to the flower arrangements made up of soft blue and purple hues.
