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"Honey, I already have an outfit for the wedding." My mom laughs. "Let's go for a cocktail." I shoot a glare at my mom. "Mom! Did you just make that up to get out of there?" I chuckle.
"I just wanted you and me to have some time alone together, so I did not want it to sound too exciting, like cocktails, in case the love birds decided to try and join us." She giggles a naughty laugh and I start the car, smiling.
"Alright. I know just the spot." I pull out into the road and head towards a beautiful cocktail bar I know nearby with amazing views.
We drive most of the way in silence. Mom is cheerfully humming to the music on the radio, and I am lost in thought again about Alex. I want to ask my mom so many questions, but I don't even know where to start.
The biggest question on my mind that is bothering me a lot is that I don't know if I maybe did something to Alex to make him not want to be around me. I keep wondering if maybe I offended him in some way or did something to change his mind about me. I must have done something wrong. That must be why he does not want to be with me any other way than in the bedroom.
I guess I am just not really good enough for him maybe. I mean, he is ridiculously good-looking, he is rich beyond measure, and he can have any girl in the world. So why would he bother with someone like me? I fight back tears at the emotional sting of not being good enough. It is so difficult for me because I know I am a good person. I know I have a kind and soft heart, but I can't force people to see that, and I can't and will not force people to want to be with me.
I can't force Alex to love me, or even like me.
We pull up in the parking lot, hop out of the car, and make our way into the bright and colorful bar. It reminds me of home. That is why I love it so much here.
Mom orders us a pitcher of lemon margaritas and I shake my head, smiling. So, this is not aone-cocktailkind of afternoon then.
"A whole pitcher mom?" I laugh.
"Don't judge me. I need to relieve some stress too you know. Planning a wedding is hard work and it is the first wedding out ofallof my kids, so I am really excited - but gosh it is exhausting." She grins.
I know she loves it. She loves planning things and being around family so this has been absolute heaven for her.
We chat about silly things and make comments on the bright yellow theme of the wedding. I laugh thinking it is really intense as a color for a wedding, but Lita is so excited about it and honestly, it suits her bright and happy personality.
The waiter brings our margarita pitcher as well as a plate of nachos and four chili poppers. My mom takes a bite of one of the chili poppers and grins. "Oh, they do them perfectly here. I am impressed." She says.
I pour each of us a glass of margarita from the pitcher and then Mom turns to me with a serious expression.
"Alright, it's time. Spit it out. What is eating at you? You have had it all over your face for the entire week now." Her eyes stare into me.
I sigh. I knew it was coming, and Ididwant to talk about it, but I also didn't want to get overwhelmed and start crying in public.
"Well. It's a bit complicated." My eyes lock with hers.
"It's your neighbor, isn't it. The hot one across the street." She smiles innocently.
"What? How in the world did you know?" I say, flabbergasted.
"You think mothers don't know everything?" She grins.
"Well." I sigh, "Maybe it is not as complicated as I thought then." I laugh lightly. I sip my cocktail and then take a deep breath.
"The thing is, Mom, I think I am head over heels for him, but things are kind of going weirdly between us."
"Weird how?" she asks patiently, waiting for me to explain.
"We get along so well when we do things together. He took me on a date which Ithoughtwas like anofficialdate and it was a really magical night. I have spent time with his daughter, and she is the sweetest thing. And Alex and I - we are so good together - but then it gets weird."
"You are going to have to be more specific than that, Gabi, my girl?" my mom insists.
"I know," I say, then I explain to her about the birthday party where he ignored me as though I was practically nothing to him. I told her how I felt like we were perfect in private and then as soon as we were in public, he was somehow ashamed of me or that he wanted to keep me a secret from his friends and his daughter. I tell her how much that is hurting me.
"Having a child involved does make it more difficult you know." She says, thoughtfully. "But I think the only way you two can understand each other is if you take the time to talk about it." She says as though it is the most obvious thing in the world. And in a way it is but I hate confrontation.
"He has been trying to talk to me. He keeps messaging me and asking me what is wrong and if we can talk." I say.
"Then talk to him, Gabi. You are being really silly. Why would you not want to talk to him?"
