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I shrugged. “It should’ve never happened. The woman sends Christmas cards to strangers because she believes in some fantasy that doesn’t exist. I’m no knight in shining armor.”
“Well, that much we know. Because as far as I’m aware, there aren’t any knights named Sir Surliness or Lord Grumpalot. But that’s beside the point. Josie is a smart woman. She knows exactly who you are. Yet for some insane reason, she still cares about your ass. So tell us what went down, and we’ll try and help you fix it.”
I raked a hand through my hair. “There’s nothing to fix.”
The coffeemaker beeped. My mom had been leaning against the counter watching Opal and me, but she turned and opened the cabinet above her head, the one where I kept mugs. She froze with one in her hand, looking out the window to the yard. “Where’s the kayak that’s always in the same spot on the dock?”
When I didn’t cough up an answer fast enough, Mom turned. “Fox, where’s the kayak?”
This wasn’t going to end unless I gave them something. Might as well be what they came for. I closed my eyes, because I knew the reaction my answer would garner. “It sank in the lake. With Josie and me in it.”
The room grew quiet. I imagined the glances being exchanged before the looks of pity were directed at me. Eventually, there was a rattling of dishes and the sound of the chair next to me scraping along the tile floor. When I opened my eyes, I was surprised to find there weren’t mugs on the table—there were shot glasses. Mom took the bottle of whiskey in front of me and poured a round. The three of us knocked them back in silence. Two ounces seemed to have a much bigger effect on me than it should’ve. It seemed to reactivate my drunkenness. My head spun, and I slouched over the tiny glass.
Mom reached out and rested her hand on my forearm. “I know it’s scary, but you can’t let things from your past keep you from having a future.”
“I’m not scared. I’m doing Josie a favor. I helped her with some work around the house. She took that as meaning more than it did.”
Opal rolled her eyes. “She wasn’t seeing things that weren’t there. She was seeing what was written all over your face. We all saw it. You’re head over heels for that woman. You have been since the first moment you set eyes on her.”
I scoffed. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I saw you smile, Fox. Not the evil one you flash when an owner thinks they can stiff you and get away with it, but really smile, the kind that starts on the inside and spreads to the outside, making your whole face light up.”
“I think you need glasses.”
She shook her head. “I’ve always admired your smarts. But right now you’re being a dumbass.”
I needed to move. This town had too many people in your business, and everyone knew where you lived to drop by and share their opinions. I had no doubt Porter, Rita, Frannie, Bernadette and Bettina—and everyone else in Opal’s speed dial—would be by soon enough. I was definitely disconnecting the doorbell as soon as I got them out the door.
I huffed. “Are we done?”
My mom looked disappointed, but she nodded. A few minutes later, I walked them to the door. Opal walked out first, but Mom lagged behind.
Again she kissed my cheek. “I hope you come around. Because that lady next door is something special. But if you don’t, you at least owe her some closure. Have a conversation and set her free. You aren’t the only one who fell hard.”
Her words hit like a punch to the gut. But she was right, so I nodded. “Alright, Mom.”
***
Thursday morning—at least I thought it was Thursday—I woke at the ass crack of dawn, still buzzing from the night before, my feet hanging off the couch I didn’t fit on. I looked around in the dark, trying to figure out what the hell that pungent smell was. Then I lifted my arm and sniffed my pit.Damn, it’s me.
Forcing my dragging ass up, I stopped in the kitchen for some breakfast of champions—three Motrin and a palm full of tap water cupped in my hand from the sink. I debated whether I should wait until my head stopped pounding to shower, but I was pretty sure that’s what I’d done yesterday and never made it. So I sucked it up and headed upstairs.
Warm water sluiced over my slumping shoulders. What normally felt good was like needles pricking my skin today. Everything ached—my head, my shoulders, my neck. Though the biggest ache came from inside my chest. It fucking hurt, felt like an elephant had parked his fat ass on my ribs for a few days. But I deserved it.
By the time I washed the stink off of me, the sun was up. An annoying ray streaked through the blinds and cut a rude path across my bleary eyes. I squinted and reached for the wooden slats. Before I could flatten the offending pieces, I saw her. It took my damn breath away. Josie walked into the yard, carrying her duck in her arms. She set it down on the grass and took a few steps back. But the thing ran right to her, nuzzling against her legs.Yeah, I know, buddy.
She bent to scratch its head and smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. It made me feel like someone had shot a dart and pierced right into my heart. I stayed there watching her on the sly for another ten minutes, feeling like I deserved every ounce of the pain it caused, until she finally scooped up the duck and went back inside.
My mother was right about one thing—Josie deserved better than I’d given her. So it was time I manned up and had a conversation. The sooner she moved on, the better for both of us.
Twenty minutes later, I stood outside her front door. My palms were sweaty, and I debated turning around and having a shot or two before knocking. Before I could shit or get off the pot, the door swung open.
Josie jumped back. “Shit. I didn’t expect anyone to be there.”
“Sorry.”
She wasn’t smiling, but I saw something spark in her eyes. I thought it might be hope. “How are you?”
