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“Who’s at the door?” A man with laugh lines and salt-and-pepper hair appears. “Can I help you?”
“I must have the wrong room.” I glance between the two of them and offer an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry to disturb you.”
Before they shut the door, I spot two children sitting on a couch overlooking the TV. Then the door slams shut, and I wince.
I lean against the nearest wall and bite back a groan. While I have no idea why Adrian has changed rooms, I know it can’t be a good thing.
Not with things being what they are.
Between us.
I try not to dwell on it as I walk back to my cabin and climb into bed.
In the morning, I’m still trying to think of an explanation when Adrian comes into the dining hall. He has a spring in his step, and he looks as handsome as ever in his shorts and t-shirt.
Suddenly, a mixed, sweet and sour feeling grips the core of my body. I begin to ponder the extent of Adrian's mental health challenges.
He mentioned a relative with anger and alcohol issues, and now I can't help but wonder if he was subtly referring to himself… Oh poor Adrian!
Reflecting on our conversations, all the pieces start falling into place. He spoke about the benefits of therapy and how it was initially challenging for him.
I shake my head, releasing a heavy sigh.
Concern fills me as I wonder whether he is still seeking help. I feel a tightness in my chest and a squeeze in my heart, imagining the struggles he faces in keeping this side of himself hidden.
Managing a successful business while grappling with such unpredictable challenges must be incredibly difficult.
Realizing how challenging it must be for him, my heart goes out to Adrian.
Now I start to understand the importance of allowing him the space to share, rather than pushing him to discuss it.
It's clear he's dealing with something deeply personal, and I want to support him in his own time
The main question is, do I want to continue my intimate relationship with him?
In an instant, a wave of emotions crashes over me—sadness, anger, empathy, sympathy, annoyance, frustration, all converging at once.
The intensity builds, and I find myself yearning to release it all, to scream out loud, but I don't.
His eyes sweep over the room, and they linger on me. Then he straightens his back and links his fingers together.
“Good morning, everyone. I’ve got some good news. Since the weather is getting better, it’s now safe for us to go on a hike.”
A cheer rises through the room.
“Anyone who wants to join should sign up. We have only a limited amount of space to ensure everyone is being tended to. So please write your names down as quickly as possible. The sign-up sheet will be posted on the bulletin board next to the main desk.”
Another murmur rises through the crowd.
Adrian looks away from me and smiles. “There will be more hikes throughout the week if you miss this one. Looking forward to seeing you all. Thank you.”
With that, he spins on his heels and leaves. Why am I disappointed that he didn't come to my table? God, I want him. And at the same time, I don't think I should want him.
How can I settle this fight inside me? Do I want him or do I not?
I linger over breakfast, hunched low in my seat. Then I carry my tray over to the nearest bin and leave it there. On my way out of the dining room, I’m still searching for Adrian.
In the hallway outside the dining room, I bend down to tie my shoe laces and spot something out of the corner of my eye.
