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Danielle abruptly spins, so she’s looking at me directly. “I don’t know. That’s the thing. You told me that you can see a future with me. But how does that work when there’s so much we don’t know about each other?”
I shrug. “Sometimes these things happen. Sometimes you meet someone. And you know that they’re meant to be in your life. It’s not unusual.”
Danielle purses her lips. “It’s not, but I don’t know if I’m at a point in my life where a leap of faith is enough.”
I take a step toward her and stop. “What are you saying?”
“There’s too much I don’t know.” Danielle glances away and shifts from one foot to the other. “And without knowing all of the variables, I don’t know if I can take that kind of risk.”
“Variables?”
“Yes, variables,” Danielle replies, pausing to move away from me. She begins to pace, leaves and twigs crunching against her feet. “You know how I feel about you, Adrian, but love isn’t always enough.”
I exhale. “Yes, I know that.”
“And I came here to find myself again and pick up the pieces after the divorce. I didn’t come here looking for this… Looking for you. It’s all just a lot, and I need to think.”
Silence stretches between us.
“I wasn’t trying to put pressure on you earlier,” Danielle continues in a whisper-soft voice. “I know what it looks like now, but I honestly thought it was what I needed to hear from you.”
“And I am not going to pressure you either.” I stand up straighter and ball my hands into fists at my sides. “You can take as long as you want to think about things.”
Danielle stops pacing and looks over at me. “You’re not mad?”
“Why would I be? This is a big step. In less than a month, we’ve admitted our feelings to each other. And here we are talking about whether or not we have a future together…. It can be a lot to process.”
And no matter how sure I am of my feelings for her, that are not enough to sustain us.
I can see that she's allowing the impact of her previous relationships to get in the way of our relationship. She's trying to fix an issue that I don't even have.
Danielle needs to feel the same as I feel about her. And she has to want this as badly as I do. Otherwise, we are just going to end up hurting each other.
While a part of me hates this conversation, another part of me knows how important it is.
I’m holding my breath.
Considering her past, it’s perfectly normal for her to be the one to have doubts. With a sigh, I give Danielle a small smile and wait.
She doesn’t smile back.
Instead, she draws herself up to her full height and clasps her hands behind her back. “Thank you.”
Without waiting for a response, she gives me a quick hug. Then she turns her back on me and disappears. I stare at the spot she occupied, wondering if I’m going to try to win her back.
Eventually, when I’m sure she’s far enough away, I sink to the ground and take up her position on the blanket. Frowning, I stretch my legs out on either side of me and tilt my head back.
A half-moon hangs low against the backdrop of inky black sky and smattering of stars.
In the distance a wolf howls, but it’s not enough to make me stir from my spot. Even concern for my own safety can’t make me head back to the retreat.
Not yet at least.
Sometime later, I’m still lost in my own thoughts when my phone buzzes. I fish it out of my pocket, half-hoping it’s Danielle and half-dreading it.
When my eyes settle on my phone, and I see Brian’s message, my stomach gives an odd little lurch.
Hastily, I stagger to my feet, pausing to brush dirt and dust off of my jeans. Then I snatch the blanket up and sprint back in the direction of the ranch.
