AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“No.”
I turn around, not looking at Louis, and walk into the warehouse, avoiding any explanations. I can’t even explain it to myself, but the thought of agreeing to do a deal on Gerardo’s terms makes my skin crawl. Even if he gets Jacinta, he’s not gonna stop. She’s our only chance to force him into obedience, and we can’t give her up so easily.
Ican’t give her up so easily.
I storm into the office and lean on Riccardo’s desk, listening to my own heavy breathing. The image of Jacinta sprawled on the sheets underneath me haunts me, and I know I can’t let her go so quickly. Tonight? I close my eyes, and the tight feeling in my chest becomes clearer. She opened something inside of me, and for the first time in my life, I can’t bring myself to follow my duty.
I can’t let her go.
“Paolo, don’t be an idiot!” Louis bursts into the office with the same fervor, following my steps. “Don’t you see that he’s desperate enough to beg for a deal?”
“He wants to bribe us,” I growl, but Louis only laughs.
“So what? That was the whole point of kidnapping Jacinta!” He walks closer to me in agitation and grabs my shoulder, squeezing it tightly. “Paolo, we have a chance to get all we want in exchange for her. We have to use itnow.”
I know he’s right, I know I will have to let her go someday, but…
“No.”
“Paolo—”
“I saidno!”
I sharply straighten up and brush Louis’ hand off my shoulders, turning to look him in the eyes with a challenge. Louis clearly can read it, and he purses his lips, holding my gaze with cold fire in his eyes—and for a moment, it looks like he’s gonna punch me.
I wouldn’t mind it.
I need a release for my anger and tension, so I turn to face him properly, but after a few seconds Louis curses under his breath and turns away. He pushes me slightly on the way to the door, but I don’t have enough energy left to make him answer for it.
First, I have to figure out how to keep Jacinta to myself and stop the Mexicans from declaring war.
Chapter 8 - Jacinta
God, what is wrong with me?
I gather my blankets around me as if their warmth will calm my heart down. It’s been a while since Paolo left my room, but I still feel like he’s here. The grip of his hands on my wrists, the force of his kiss on my lips, the pressure of his knee on the sweetest spot in my body—the sensations still overwhelm me. I’d give anything for him to stay and take me again.
I close my eyes, raise my hand to run a finger over my lips, and it’s so easy to imagine that it’s Paolo teasing me. My body tightens up in response to the thought, and I push myself deeper into the pillows with a groan. My hand reaches down between my legs. I’ve already teased myself into an orgasm—but it’s not the same.
Ever since Paolo claimed my body, the pleasure of my own touches has been so dull and empty. God, I want him to do it again, but…I open my eyes and bite my lips. How can I wish for something so filthy?
Paolo didn’t treat me like a princess—he treated me like a whore. The sex we’d had was unacceptable, rough, and borderline abusive, and I feel ashamed that I enjoyed it. Never in my life had I imagined that I’d let a man treat me like that, so I keep avoiding him in hopes that it will make me forget him. But Paolo has opened a hidden chest of dark desires in my heart, and now, I can’t think about anything but him.
My body is craving him—but maybe not only my body. Because ever since that night, I’ve been trying to gather enough willingness and determination to create a new plan of escape, but nothing has come of it. I justdon’t wantto leave the mansion anymore. My desire to spend one more night with Paolo is stronger than my longing for freedom, and it scares me so much.
How can I be so attached to the man who kidnapped me?
I hide my face in my hands and let out a quiet groan again. My feelings are a mess, the walls of my heart are crumbling, and with my mind weakened in this chaos I hear Emilio’s voice again. How can I hope to be loved? How can I be treated as anything more than a toy? Paolo is probably disgusted by my body anyway. Of course, that’s why he left! He doesn’t really want me—he just uses my body because I let him.
I dig my fingers deeper into my temples and forehead, tightening my grip on myself. My heart is full of hurt and despair, and I feel so damn stupid. God, why haven’t I escaped yet? What am I dreaming about? Paolo will never look at me as a woman, even less as a lover.
I have to pull myself together. I have to get out of here—but as if in response to my thoughts, I feel a wave of nausea. It’s so strong that I scramble out of bed and rush to the bathroom. As always, nothing comes out, but that doesn’t make me feel better. I still heave, hoping to see any signs that it’s food poisoning or some kind of stress response, but it only leaves me on the floor of the bathroom feeling like shit.
I wish this was the first time, but no, things like this have been happening for quite a while now. Almost a week, actually. So even if I were to ignore my weird desire to be close to Paolo, I still can’t get out of here on my own—and the most annoying part is that I don’t even know how to stop it. Or if I can stop it at all.
I take a steadying breath and get up on my feet, leaning on the bathroom counter. Right next to my hand there is a pregnancy test, and I just stare at it for a few seconds, feeling the nervousness tie knots in my guts.
My period was supposed to start three days ago, and I…I don’t even know what to think about it, okay? Maybe I’m overthinking. Maybe I’m allowing my panic to guide me, but I did ask Alice to get the test for me. It won’t do me any harm, right? I just want to check, and I’m sure I’m just imagining things. I mean, I can’t be that unlucky. I can’t get pregnant after myfirst time having sex!
