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Her beauty was as subtle as a beam of light. She had no fucking clue how gorgeous she was.
My Lucila.
I stepped out of the car, and when they realized she was coming for me, they adverted their eyes. I didn’t. Not until they passed.
She eyed me from across the roof of the car, passenger side. “You done?”
I shrugged.
She shook her head. “Can we talk?” She tapped the metal. “Here. In the car. Not in the house.”
Before I could get to her side, she opened the door and took shotgun. She closed it, turning to acknowledge the dog trying to lick her face from the back seat.
I got in and closed the door. I took a deep breath when I did. The scent of her filled the interior. It tied me up and refused to let me go. Like all the memories.
“I asked Aren to drop me off,” she said. “I needed to see you in person.”
“Needed,” I said, turning to face her.
She turned her face forward. “Carine is worried about you.”
I had nothing to say to that. What could I say? Ma had always worried about me.
“It’s different now, you know?” she whispered, seeming to read my mind. “I don’t want her to worry. I want her to know that no matter what, you have someone.”
She turned to face me, and our eyes met. “I love her, Lilo.”
“Your love for her brought you here.”
She shrugged. “She’s done so much for me…” She shook her head. “We need to do something for her. We need to get married.”
Silence stretched between us.
“No,” I said.
“And I was so sure you were going to agree.” She blew out a heavy breath. “This is not about us. This is about doing something for a mother who deserves this. She didn’t get to—”
“No.”
“How can you say no to this?”
“Because it’s not true.”
“We’re already married, Lilo!”
The sound of her voice shocked the atmosphere between us, and Mooch whined.
Yeah, the day after Gallo’s visit to the gym, I took her to the courthouse and married her. The memory of getting locked out of the hospital had been fresh, and so was my reason for marrying her before she could plan a wedding. She sensed something was off with Gallo that night. I didn’t want her to find out the extent of my involvement with him. Because she might have locked me out.
That wasn’t a life every woman was prepared to live. And I didn’t want that for her. But after Gallo’s visit, I knew things were going to change.
We had kept the marriage a secret, though. The only one who knew was Sonny. Lucila didn’t want to hurt ma by doing what we did. She had been excited to help her plan a wedding, since I told her of my plans before. It had given her something to look forward to after the diagnosis. It was best that she never found out. The truth would have haunted her.
My wife and I lived separate lives, but we were still connected. My heart lived outside my chest, but the veins were still attached.
It was still a secret, hiding in the shadow that followed us both around. My wife tried to sever it, but I fought her for the knife and won.
“We are,” I said.
