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Once again, my hands tremble when I hit send. I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until a message comes through.
Unknown: Who the hell is this?
Well, it’s not the response I was hoping for, but it’s a start.
Zane: Clearly the owner of this number.
Unknown: But. . . never mind. I won’t bother you ever again.
Dammit! I just fucked this up and I need to fix it.
I apologize for giving rise to this complication
But I just might have the perfect solution
You continue sending me your thoughts and reflections
And I will stop with my spontaneous impulses
I quickly hit send and sit back and wait. Hoping she’s still there and hasn’t deleted the number once and for all. A few minutes tick by and I’m ready to throw it all in when she responds.
Tell me why I should trust a stranger
When clearly my messages were for a friend
Someone who is very dear to my heart
Unlike you who hides behind your brazen cowardice
Ouch. That stings, but I can certainly understand why she’d think that. I’ve been receiving her messages for months and never responded. She was pouring her heart and soul into her thoughts and I come along and invade her privacy.
I understand why you’d come to that conclusion
But I can assure you from the start
I only wanted what was best for you
And didn’t care how this would affect me
I don’t have to wait long for her response this time around.
Stop pretending like you know me at all
It is quite clear you know absolutely nothing
How dare you say you want what’s best
When you’ve never seen me at my worst
She’s absolutely right. I’ve been addicted to her messages for so long, but I really don’t know her at all. Perhaps, I should just delete her number and carry on with my life as if we never had contact. But, if she’s reaching out to me even in some small way, can I just let her go? No, I can’t. If she doesn’t want me to send her a text, then she needs to delete this number.
Although we have never met face-to-face
I’d like to think I know you indirectly
But if you’re determined to end this chat
Then pull the plug and wallow in silence
