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“Mommy wants a puppy too?” Her smile is infectious as she looks into her daddy’s eyes with glee.
“No, Ava. Mommy wants something so much bigger than that. She was sad because she has to wait. Just like you. But, good things come to those who wait, right?”
Suddenly, I feel like an intruder on this vast expanse of beach. But curiosity has gotten the better of me, so I sit up and remove my glasses. Father and daughter share the same brilliant blue eyes as they whisper in hushed tones. Secrets for their ears only.
A new voice chimes in, addresses the daddy. “Hey, Hunter. They’ve been trying to reach you for over an hour now.” I nonchalantly glance over my shoulder and see a petite blonde holding up a walkie-talkie.
“Thanks, Emma. Can you take Ava home for me while I get back to work?”
“Sure thing,” Emma chirps. “Come on, jelly bean, your daddy needs to get going.” My heart breaks when the child clings to her father and won’t let go. He wipes away her tears, kisses her cheeks and then waves goodbye.
“Love you, daddy.”
“Love you to the moon and back a trillion times ten, Ava. Catch ya later.” I’m mesmerized as I watch this little girl walk away with the other woman. Her tears are quickly forgotten as she chit chats with the blonde. She doesn’t turn around once, but her daddy does. And he catches me watching them. My cheeks heat instantly when his eyes meet mine head on. He nods once in my direction just to let me know he’s onto me before walking away.
After witnessing that sweet moment between father and daughter, an overwhelming sense of loss grabs hold of me. Will I ever have a beautiful child who worries about my tears? The answer to that is a big fat no if I don’t let go of the past and live for the present. I haven’t allowed myself the luxury of thinking about Zane too often, but he’s been on my mind lately. The last words he spoke to me flitter across my mind. “I’m not giving up on you because you are worth fighting for.”
I’ve often wondered what would have happened if I hadn’t let him go that night. If I had held on tight and lived in the moment instead of living in the past. Deep down, I know Ryder would want me to be happy. Hell, I would have wanted the same damn thing for him if the roles were reversed. Ugh, why am I still so torn when it comes to the two of them? Stop it, Lili. Just stop beating yourself up about it. Didn’t that man just tell his daughter that good things come to those who wait? Yeah, but the million-dollar question is how long will Zane wait for me?
I quickly grab my Kindle out of my bag and begin reading. Anything to keep my mind off Zane Sinclair. It’s too much for me to wrap my head around while I’m on the east coast and he’s back home. Tomorrow’s another day.
I’m completely absorbed in my book and would have gladly continued if it weren’t for the fact that the sun’s slowly setting. The brilliant colors are exploding all around me and I just drink them all in. Pinks, purples and reds illuminate the sky with the promise of another glorious day. It makes me sad knowing I won’t be here for the breathtaking view, but I know I’ll have one just as magnificent on the opposite coast. Standing on my balcony while sipping a glass of my favorite wine.
How ironic that it took a little girl and her daddy, so many miles away from home, to make me realize I can’t live in the past forever. That all good things come to those who wait. And love doesn’t always come easy. But if you don’t take that leap of faith, you might be missing out on something extraordinary.
Starting tomorrow, I’m going to savor the little things in life instead of taking them all for granted. I won’t allow anyone or anything to slip through my fingers, ever again. I know I can never get back the past, but I have some wonderful memories to carry with me into the future. And I’m going to try like hell to start living my life without Ryder, by tucking his memory into the shattered hollow of my heart.
Where he will live with me forever.
CHAPTER 18
ZANE
It’s been two days since I replied to my unknown, and I haven’t heard a peep since. I fucked up. This might have been her only way to anonymously express her feelings. I’m such an idiot for thinking that I might have comforted her in some strange way. Yeah, my ego must be out of control if I thought I’d make a difference in her life. I’ve tried concentrating on work, but it’s proven difficult since my thoughts keep wandering back to her heartfelt messages. I shouldn’t let it bother me so much, but it does.
Enough is enough. I need to buckle down right this minute and get my shit together, since I have another afterparty this Saturday night. It’s on a smaller scale than some I’ve hosted in the past, but that doesn’t mean it’s unimportant. I take them all very seriously and that’s the reason I’ve become one of the top venues in the area. With a little extra hard work, I’m hoping to hit number one in the next year or two. Nothing can stop me, and as far as I’m concerned, the sky’s the limit.
It’s amazing how much work you can accomplish in a few hours without any interruptions. I’m finally all caught up and I think that deserves a much-needed cigarette break. I make sure to close my laptop and grab my cigs before heading out the door.
Leaning against the tree, I light up and check my messages. Unlike some people, I can multitask while I’m on break. I know, I know, I sound like suck a dick. I’m disappointed when I scroll through my calls and there’s nothing from my unknown. Fuck, I really screwed this one up big time. It looks like I’ll never hear from her again.
Well, she might not want to send me a message—but what’s stopping me from sending her one?
Absolutely nothing.
Excitement sends my pulse racing when I try and conjure up something good to send her. Should I continue with the same format or should I make up my own? Decisions, decisions.
I start several times and delete them all. Nothing makes any sense since I’m the one initiating it this time around. I study the last one I sent her and decide to bounce this one off that one.
Here goes.
My intention was never to scare you away
I wanted to keep you in the present
So I could revel in your heartfelt messages
Not in your cacophony or never-ending silence
