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Would he have still become a puppet for White Hot?
I don’t think he would have. Tyler is the kind of man who still would have been successful — there’s no doubt in my mind about that — but I think he would have done it his way. He wouldn’t have relied on people who didn’t have his best interests at heart.
Still, I know that this woman wants to connect with Gilded Cage. It was their show; I was just playing the guitar and singing backup for them.
“I’m sorry. I’m not with Gilded Cage. I can put you in contact with their manager, but I think they’re on tour right now.”
Joelle laughs, the sound sweet and soft. “I think you misunderstood me. I wantyou, not Gilded Cage. There was something so beautiful and captivating about the way you performed. We would only need you to perform for about an hour, but the show is this Friday.”
I’m shellshocked. This day is one that I thought would never come. Someone wants me and not just Gilded Cage. This woman wants to hear the music I want to play.
Is this something I think I can do? Do I want a chance to perform on my own and see if it’s something I really like?
I never thought I wouldn’t be part of a band, but this is a chance to get back on the horse. There might still be a chance for me to chase my dreams after all.
“I’ll do it.”
“Amazing! If you text your email to this phone number, then I’ll send all the details through.”
As the call ends, my spirits start to lift just a tiny bit. In just a few days’ time, I’m going to find out who I am as a performer without the band.
Staring out at the crowd of people in their dresses and suits, I feel sick, but it has nothing to do with stage fright. Over the last few days, I’ve felt nauseous almost constantly.
I take a breath and end one song, flowing into another. The room around me starts to spin but I keep strumming. My head feels light as I sway to the beat of the music.
All I have to do is make it through the next two songs and then I can go home and feel as sick as I want to.
Sweat beads on the back of my neck as I continue to play, smiling out at the crowd around me. People are dancing and singing along. I watch them, knowing that being a solo artist is something I don’t want.
This has been a great experience, but it isn’t for me. I want to be on the stage, making music with people who mean the world to me. Sharing the high of performing was one of my favorite parts of being in a band.
I don’t want to give that up.
The moment I’m done singing the last song, I rush off the stage and head for the bathroom. I slam open the door and head for one of the stalls as bile rises in my throat.
I’m barely leaning over the toilet when I get sick.
“Cassie!” Paige’s heels click against the floor as she rushes into the washroom. “What’s going on? Are you all right?”
“Not really.” I groan and get to my feet. I press the handle with my foot before heading to the sink to wash out my mouth. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I’ve been feeling like shit all week.”
Paige looks at me in the mirror, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open slightly. “Cassie, are you pregnant?”
I grip the edge of the sink, feeling like I’m going to be sick again. As I stand there, the world spinning around me, I start to count back the days in my head. My blood rushes in my ears as I do the math again.
“I think we need to go get a pregnancy test.”
CHAPTER 20
TYLER
Fifty calls. At least two calls a day for the last three weeks, and Cassie hasn’t answered one of them. Each and every one goes to voicemail, leaving me feeling worse than what I did before I made the call.
I pull another cigarette out of the pack and lean against the tour bus. The arena is already starting to fill up with people waiting for the show. I keep my head down, my hat hiding my face.
Men and women are laughing in a large group as they join the back of the line. One of the men leans down to kiss the woman next to him, looking at her like she’s the only person in the world that he sees.
Hell, she might be. Cassie is the only person that I’m capable of seeing. Every time I lay down at night and close my eyes, all I can see is her.
