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“Please try and understand. The friendship we have has nothing to do with the Fraternitas. It is real. You’re the batty tuh mi bench. The ackee to my saltfish and fried dumplin,” Shay jokes, then wipes away the tears streaming in rivulets down her face with the back of her hand. “I had no choice. My mom’s position in town was on the line. I’d given you one too many clues and answered far too many questions. If I so much as breathed wrong, we’d have been exiled.”
I grit my teeth, halting my steps. She’s right. Everyone in this town is regulated by rules, both spoken and unspoken. Closing my eyes, I reign in my hurt and anger. If I were in her place and my family was hanging in the balance, there would be no hesitation. Calmer, I sigh, then open my eyes to face her. “I’m still pissed, not so much at you. The Fraternitas and every organization like it will suck your soul and sell your future generations to the highest bidder.” Walking toward her, I wrap her in a hug. At least, I try to. The beachball in front of me makes it hard to fully embrace her.
We both laugh, wiping the remnants of our tears away. “Just so you know, I had rope, duct tape, and a blindfold ready if you would’ve said you were no longer my friend,” Shay jests.
“Fucking stalker,” I quip.
Smirking, she retorts, “Hey, you never know when you might need to subdue someone. I believe in being prepared for all situations.”
“Now you just sound like Wyatt,” I tease. We both look at each other and burst into laughter.
As we sit on the couch, Shay continues to tell me everything she knows, cementing my decision. When she gets up to use the bathroom, I pull out the phone and send a text.
Me: Move forward.
Unknown: …..
I hear the sink faucet turn on and know I’m about to run out of time. Biting the inside of my cheek, I run through the plan again. So many lives will be impacted. I can only hope that when it all comes to fruition, everyone I love will be standing with me. The pipe turns off, and I start to put the phone away when another text alert sounds.
Unknown: Everything’s in place. Dispose of this phone, and we’ll be in touch when it’s time.
A Cheshire Cat grin grows on my face. Step three has begun.
After the tense conversation I had with Shay earlier and reading four more passages from Wes’s journal, I desperately need a break from all the intense emotions. The pain and grief poured from Wes’s words struck me at my center. I can still taste his regret in every penned word.
“You scared us, Ry,” Jamie mutters as we get ready to watch a movie with Kellan and Kylan. Her jewel-green eyes well with tears.
“Don’t cry, Jams. I’m here, and everything is going to be okay,” I say, trying to reassure her.
She shakes her head. “Nothing’s been okay since Dad was taken three years ago. We’ve been on an endless loop of heartache. Our family has been destroyed. Moving here was supposed to fix it, but it only got worse.”
Leaning over, I press a kiss on the top of my sister’s head. “It has been a very long three years. Before we lost Dad, we lost Mom.”
“No, we never had her. Mom never existed.”
I rub the crease on my forehead, happy the boys are still downstairs picking out their movie snacks. “Oh, Jams, she existed. Hold on to the moments that brought you joy, but never get lost in them. Let go of the moments that hurt you, but remember the lessons that came from that pain.”
She begins to sit up, so I follow suit. “What do you mean?”
Smiling, I reply, “Even though we discovered our mother was never who she pretended to be, we shouldn’t let her rob us of the happy memories. We’ve gained so much. More family and new friends to create new moments with.”
I brush the last of her tears from her face. She looks so much like our mom. “We did,” she exclaims. “It just sucks that we had to lose her in the process. I miss her.”
She hangs her head, and I tip her chin so she’ll meet my gaze. “And there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re allowed to mourn her. To feel a hole in the place she used to be.”
Jamie’s lips quirk seconds before she wraps her arms around my neck. “Thanks, Ry. I love you.”
“I love you, and any time you want to talk, I’m here. And if you ever want or need professional support to help you process what you’re feeling, let one of us know.”
Her grin grows as the twin terrors come piling onto the bed with what looks like the whole kitchen. “Time to watch Venom,” Ky screams.
“No, I want to watch Guardians of the Galaxy,” Kell shouts.
I snatch the remote off the bed. “Snooze, you lose. First up is Iron Man. We’re watching these in order.”
“Aww, come on, Ry.”
“Booo, I want Sonic.”
