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Her smile was sad asshe continued to sip her beverage. “I’m a woman and Iknow the signs, darling. You haven’t been with me and youhaven’t been seeing anyone, at least not in public, but I knowthe signs.” She repeated. “You’re here with me andI can see you want to leave.”
“I had no ideayou were clairvoyant.” He said stiffly, putting the cup downwith a snap. He was feeling guilty and it was pissing him off.
“Now I’veoffended you. I didn’t mean to. I’d like to that we couldstill be friends.”
“We arefriends.” He insisted.
“Will sheunderstand?”
“It’snot-“ Picking up the cup again, he took a sip, before puttingit down. “We are – It’s not like that.”Rising, he walked over to the bunch of paintings stacked against thewall and picked one up at random, studying the bold colors and theman hidden in the shadows.
The woman was leaningagainst the tree, head turned away from the man and her posture wasone of utter hopelessness.
Staring at it for afew minutes, he put it down and turned back to her. “It’scomplicated.” Shoving his hands into his pockets, he leanedagainst the wall, a bleak expression on his face.
“Are you inlove with her?” She asked breathlessly.
“Love? I-“He turned away to stare out the window. “I don’t want todiscuss it if you don’t mind.”
“Of course, No.It’s none of my business.”
“It’s notlike that, Miriam.” He came and sat back down. Leaning forward,he clasped his hands between his thighs. “I don’t want tohurt you.”
“I always knewit would never be me as much as I wanted it to be. So, it’sfine. I just want you to be happy.”
“A word I wouldnever have associated with myself before.” He lifted ashoulder. “She’s intriguing.” He had no idea thathis face lit up when he was talking about her. “She’sblunt and irreverent and – Christ!” He rubbed a hand atthe back of his neck. “I don’t know what the hell I’mon about.”
“That’snot like you.” She was watching him closely.
“No.” Headmitted. “I don’t feel comfortable discussing this withyou. I don’t know what ‘this’ is at all and I’mconfused as hell.”
“You areheading into new territory.”
“Something likethat. What does this painting mean?”
She didn’tanswer immediately but busied herself by picking up a sandwich andpicking at it.
“It’sjust a painting.” She said finally, looking up at him
“Miriam-“
“Look, I knowyou’re lost to me-“
“I’m notlost to you.” Putting the painting away, he came and hunkereddown in front of her, taking her hands in his. “I'll always bethere for you, no matter who I’m with.”
“You don’tknow that.”
“I do know. Imight be going through this ‘thing’, but you’llalways be a constant in my life. I’d like you to believe that.”
She nodded, the sheenof tears in her eyes. “I want to believe it.”
“Please do.”He rose, giving her hands a light squeeze. “I have to go.”
*****
He took the time tothink. The road was surprisingly light on traffic, the signs of theholidays lingering at the front of stores and advertising bannersblaring out end of season sales.
He’dcontemplated buying a piece of jewelry for Allison, but for the firsttime in his life, he couldn’t define a relationship. He’donly been with her twice, but the two times had been so combustiblethat it still made him hot just to think about it.
