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“Great,” Jasper said, wearing one of those indecipherable smiles again. “I’ll just… hang out in the living room then. Call me if you need anything.” He seemed to hesitate for a second, then left the two of us alone.
Cameron pulled a jar of jam out of the fridge and put it on the counter, then dragged one of the chairs over so he could reach the higher shelves in the cabinet. “Do you like peanut butter and jam?” he asked me.
“It’s my favorite,” I told him, though it had been far too long since I’d eaten something so simple. The team’s dietician encouraged a strict diet, lots of organic vegetables and lean proteins, something about reducing risk of injury. But in this moment, as my son passed me a bread bag and a knife, I couldn’t give a damn about the diet. I just wanted to eat with my son.
“Here, you spread the peanut butter first, and I’ll do the jam.” He pointed at the cupboard to my right. “The plates are up there.”
I grabbed us each a plate, and we got to work on making the sandwiches. I wanted so desperately to get this right, but what did I know about kids? I’d always assumed whenever I finally got around to starting a family that I would start with a baby, and I would learn from there. “Uh, so… what kinds of things do you like?” I asked, trying to fill the silence. I should’ve come up with topics beforehand. I was drowning here.
Cameron made a face. “I dunno… stuff. Like, comic books and sports and baking. Lots of stuff.” He paused mid-jam-spread. “This is weird,” he said bluntly.
I laughed. “Fair enough. It’s a bit weird for me too. I promise it won’t always be, though. We just need to get used to each other.”
“I know. I guess I just wish I met you before. Like, ten years ago.” He shrugged like it was no big deal, but I could feel the weight of the missing years between us.
My heart gave a painful squeeze. “Me too. Don’t blame your dad, though, okay? It was my fault.”
“Why? What did you do?” he asked, peeking up at me.
“I said some things that weren’t very nice. And I really wish I hadn’t, cause I didn’t mean them.”
He frowned, either angry or disappointed, and it brought a fresh wave of guilt. “That wasn’t very nice of you.”
I offered him a pained smile. “No, it wasn’t.” I grabbed the other chair and brought it over so I could be closer to eye level with him. “Your dad is so amazing to give me another chance to get this right, and I promise I’m going to make it up to you—to both of you. How does that sound?”
He thought that over, and his pensive look was just like Jasper’s that it nearly took my breath away. Finally, he nodded. “Okay. It’s a deal.” And he held out his hand for me to shake on it.
7
Jasper
Kelwaswatchingmewith rapt curiosity, his chin propped in his hand, elbows resting on the desk in front of him. “Oh my gods, did he really say that? That he would make it up to the both of you?” He held his hand to his forehead like he was going to swoon. “So romantic.”
“Shh!” I hissed, peeking over the counter to make sure nobody in the waiting room was listening in on our conversation. Thankfully, the mournful yowl of the Persian, Mr. Frisky, locked in his carrier was drowning out our words. “I mean, I think that’s what he said, but it was hard to hear him clearly from the next room.”
What I didn’t tell him was that I was leaning so far out of my chair in order to eavesdrop that I nearly fell over onto the floor. I had intended to leave them alone to get to know each other without my interfering. I didn’t want to be a helicopter parent, but at the same time… well, I was also used to being Cam’sonlyparent. I’d never had to discuss parenting decisions with anyone before. Bedtime schedules, rewards and discipline, doctors’ appointments and vaccine schedules. What if Eric insisted on only feeding our son organic vegetables or enroll him in a bunch of sports? I couldn’t afford that.
I’d also never had to share Cam before, and I didn’t particularly like it. I never thought it would be so hard.
“So,” Kel continued, making a gimme motion with his hand, like I was supposed to hand over all the spicy details. “What’s next? Candlelit dinners and walks in the park?”
I snorted. “Yeah, right. This has nothing to do with me, Kel. He’s only here for Cameron. Nothing more.”
“Mm-hm,” he murmured, spearing me with a look. “You can swear that until you’re blue in the face, but I know there’s more to it than that. I’ve seen the way your eyes go all soft and gooey when you talk about him. There was something between you two once. There could be again.”
I shook my head sharply. “No, never. Nothing has changed since high school. We are total opposites with nothing in common. He’s still the popular jock, rich, famous, drop-dead gorgeous, with tons of omegas throwing themselves at him, and I’m still me,” I said, gesturing at myself. “Geeky, awkward, and a total buzzkill.”
“You’re selling yourself short,” Kel insisted. “You’re mega hot.” I shook my head at him, but his attention flitted over my shoulder. “Right, Brent? Tell Jasper he’s hot.”
Shit, please don’t. How much of that did he hear?I sat up straight in my seat, dread skittering through me.
Instead of answering, Brent said, “Kel, Dr. Mayle is ready for Skittles. Could you bring him back?”
Kel’s gaze moved back and forth between me and Brent, and I knew he could sense the weird tension between us. He would undoubtedly interrogate me about it later. “Sure…”
While Kel went to bring Skittles the dalmatian back to my brother’s exam room, I tried to act like I was busy typing up invoices in the computer. I could still feel Brent behind me, though, hovering.
After a few minutes of awkward silence, he cleared his throat. “So, what, are you, like… into that meathead now?”
