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Once I was back in my cosy, lilac-walled room at Mum’s, my head wouldn’t stop spinning with images of Deb trying to kiss Seb and her groping his crotch. I was grateful when my thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.
‘Come in,’ I called out as my legs dangled over the side of my bed.
‘Are you okay?’ Mum asked, standing by my door in blue silk pyjamas. Her hair was up in a bun, and her face was dewy with moisturiser. I could smell her face cream from across the room, and I felt comforted for a moment, remembering sitting beside her at her vanity as a child. I’d missed being there for her night-time routine.
‘Hi, Mum. I’m fine.’ I tried to smile but could tell from Mum’s expression I was doing a bad job at faking it.
‘You don’t look fine. Did something else happen today? I hope it’s not your job?’ Her voice raised in concern as she said the word ‘job’.
‘No, work is great. I’m just upset about this guy I was seeing. Tonight, he told me he slept with someone else, and I just feel sick.’ I shook my head at the thought.
Mum sighed. ‘And you’ve broken up with him, I hope?’
‘Of course. Straight away. What’s he going to do to fix it? He’s already done the damage, and there’s no way that type of damage can be undone.’ I pulled off my boots and let them clunk to the floor.
She nodded in agreement. ‘Good. Most of the time, cheaters never change.’
‘Yep, so they say.’ A part of me felt satisfied I’d never truly committed to Seb. Most couples had photos together plastered all over their social media accounts, which they painfully had to delete, but Seb and I had zilch. The one benefit of it was I never gave every part of me to him in the way I did to Scott. So, I must be making some progress in the land of relationships.
‘He’s just a boy, Naomi. Another one will come along,’ Mum assured me.
‘Yeah, no thanks. I’m done with men.’ I grabbed my feet and stretched out my calves to relieve the pain from standing on my feet for twelve hours.
Mum let out a laugh and said, ‘Well, you know what I think about relationships. They aren’t always worth it, in my opinion. They’re too much work.’
‘I think they’re unpredictable, which can be exciting, but also really exhausting and, in my case … disappointing.’ I let my legs dangle back over the bed and put my hands on the mattress for support.
‘Mmm. So, what did Deb do?’ Mum came and sat next to me on my bed. ‘What pushed you to leave?’ She raised her brows,and I could tell she was very interested in what I would say in response.
‘It was a combination of things. We just weren’t getting along like we used to, and she was drinking every day and even accused me of sleeping around, and then she tried to seduce Seb, the guy I was seeing. It hurt like hell because all I did was try to be a good friend to her and was treated like the villain for being myself. She’s changed, and maybe we’ve just grown apart.’ I was silent for a moment, nodding. ‘Yeah, maybe that’s what it is. We’ve grown apart and aren’t in high school anymore. We just want different things in life.’
‘Hmm, it gets to a point where you realise people you think are your friends actually aren’t, and you just stay together for old times’ sake. People grow apart all the time and want different things. That’s just a part of life and a part of growing up.’ She reached out to stroke my hair.
‘Yeah, I couldn’t do that to myself anymore. I don’t hate Deb. I still want peace between us. We’re just not suited to living together anymore, and the trust is definitely gone.’
‘It’s good you walked away, Naomi. It takes guts to walk away. You’re showing Deb and this guy they can’t treat you like that. You’re showing them your worth. In the end, it will be their loss, and they’ll both miss you.’
I thought about it for a moment. ‘Yeah, you’re right.’
‘I’m sure it’s a hidden blessing, Naomi, and now you can learn and grow from these situations. Each situation we face in life either makes or breaks us, so you be the decider of that outcome.’ She spoke with years of wisdom, and her tone was soothing.
‘I know.’ I nodded as I looked down at my lilac socks. ‘It’s just hard to finally say goodbye to Deb after all these years. She’s been my best friend since high school, and we’ve mostly been inseparable, and Seb, the cheater, was, well … I don’t even careabout him. We were together for a few months. But what hurts is he played with my head and convinced me he loved me and even bought me presents too. No wonder people have trust issues. How can he say those words with sincerity and buy me things and then sleep around?’ I shook my head at the absurdity of it.
‘Not everyone is good-natured like you, Naomi. Some people have hidden agendas. At least you know now, rather than further down the track.’ She sighed. ‘Put it this way, at least you weren’t married to him.’
I could tell Mum was about to go on a tangent about women in marriages being cheated on, but she stopped herself. I breathed out a sigh of relief. ‘Oh God, no. I would never marry Sebastian.’ My body cringed in reaction to the thought. ‘I’m more upset about Deb. I never thought she’d do this to me.’
‘Maybe it was time for those people to leave your life.’
‘Yeah, you’re right. It’s not like I have time for friends anyway. I’m too busy with my full-time job.’ I smiled a smile so bright, for a moment I forgot I was upset.
‘And Debra and this Sebastian can’t take that away from you. You got that all on your own.’ She patted me on the shoulder.
I nodded and smiled once more. There was no point dwelling over failed relationships. I had tried my best to be a good friend to Deb, and a good worker to Daniel, and give the most of me I could to Seb, and none of it seemed to be enough for any of them.
Things didn’t work out, and there was nothing I could do but focus on the things I could do.
