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I stare at her, and she points at the phone, laughing. “You have to keep watching.”
So I do.
I watch Daddoo Rabbit fucking Mama Rabbit in some very not-advisable-for-a-timid-audience positions.
“Oh my God. Is it bad that I’m getting hard?” I whisper, making sure Viv’s not in the room, so I can watch without needing to shield my crotch and my phone from her on account of her mother’s fucking next-level-obscene creativity. “I’m never going to be able to look at Daddoo Rabbit the same way again. You’ve stolen my innocence. What the hell position is…Oh fuck.” I laugh and shake my head at Jem. “We did that one last month. Made a fucking impression, did it?”
Jem simply smiles, takes hold of my chin, and directs it back toward the screen, urging me to keep watching.
Daddoo Rabbit keeps fucking Mama, but something’s happening. It looks as if Jem’s added more stuffing to Mama Rabbit throughout the sequence — to her belly.
Daddoo got his Little Miss pregnant with all that fucking — and he keeps going at her in all sorts of ways until she looks fit to burst her stuffing.
The shot leaves their raunchy little bedroom stage and moves into a much sweeter nursery. Then there’s a shot of some little bunny babies, sleeping in their little woolen beds while the proud Daddoo and Mama Rabbit watch over them. A young one with blonde curls and a blue bow; a smaller, darker-haired one,holding a teddy bear just like Tobin’s; and a new, tiny little baby bunny that I’ve never seen before.
I lower the phone and stare at Jem.
Her smile is so fucking pretty, I want to take her upstairs and do about sixteen of the fucking things Daddoo Rabbit did to Miss.
“You’re pregnant?” I whisper, my heart fluttering as much as the butterflies in my stomach.
She presses her smiling lips together and nods.
I grip the back of her head and bring her mouth to mine in a hungry, overexcited kiss, before launching off the couch and pacing one way, and then the other. “We need to celebrate. And delete that fucking thing off your phone before Viv sees it.” I throw my hands up; that was too hasty. “No.Send it to me. I want it. Fuck, I can’t belief you did that. It’s fucking brilliant, and so fucking warped, in the hottest way.” I tug at my hair and groan. “Where do I keep it? On a pen drive, in the locked box of naughty things in the closet?”
“Who has a fucking pen drive in this day and age?” Jem asks, giggling. She pats the spot next to her on the couch. “Sit your ass down, boomer. Take a breath. You’re happy?”
I sit down, unable to keep my eyes off her. “Happy?I’m fucking ecstatic.” I kiss her again, so she understands exactly how pleased I am, and leave her on the couch, feeding Tobin with a slightly dazed-looking expression on her face.
“We definitely need to have a party,” I call through the house. I walk past the playroom, and wave at Viv to follow me. “Viv, Mama’s going to have another baby. Help your studly Daddoo find the balloons.”
