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I flinch but stay quiet.
“So, I started following you, and one night, you went to a party in our part of town. I don’t really know what my plan was—I just wanted to hurt you. You walked into that dark room that night upset and perfectly vulnerable.”
My mouth drops open as the memory comes back to me—the night I fucked a stranger in the inky-black darkness of that rich boy’s bedroom.
Only, we didn’t fuck. We connected on another level—or I thought we did—through stolen kisses and needy touches, and mind-bending pleasure.
And it wasn’t a stranger.
It was Lincoln.
Lincoln. Fucking. Evans.
My stomach bottoms out. I stand up and back away from Lincoln as the realization of what he’s saying crashes through my thoughts, twisting and breaking the narrative of that night like a car wreck I can’t unsee.
Link’s eyes are desperate and scared. “It started as a hate fuck, but it didn’t end that way. As soon as we were together, I felt it, and I know you felt it, too. Somehow, between our first kiss and our last orgasm, I fell for you. Hard.”
I shake my head, his words shredding what’s left of my heart into a bloody mess. “But you left.” My voice cracks as tears burn my eyes. “I woke up and you were gone.”
“I know. I’m so fucking sorry. I was scared. I hadn’t felt anything but anger in so long—until you—and I didn’t know how to handle it so I ran.”
I look at Trey, who’s watching the whole exchange with a pained expression. “And you knew about this?”
“I…” He glances at Link and then back at me. “Not until this year after Halloween.”
“Halloween? That was months ago….” My eyes flicker back to Lincoln. “Did you read my screenplay?” I ask him quietly as I lose the battle to hold back my tears. I just don’t care anymore though. My heart hurts, and I want him to understand why.
He frowns. “Yeah, I started to read it. But what…”
“The story is a glimpse into my future, or the future I thought I always wanted anyway—a girl who moves to New York to escape her broken family life and work in the publishing industry. But she runs into the one person who's either her worst nightmare or the love of her life—the boy who took her virginity when she was at her most vulnerable and then ran.”
“I haven't gotten to the part about the guy yet. Is that about me?” He sounds dazed, his voice small like a little boy’s.
“I didn’t know it when I wrote the screenplay, but yes, I guess it is.” I take a step toward him and sit back down, clasping his hands in mine. “Look, you saved me. You pulled me from rock bottom before I even hit the ground, and the memory of that night kept me going until the day I got my acceptance letter to Whitmore U.”
I’m shaking as I continue. “But this whole time, you knew it was me? And you were still cruel. You did your damnedest to make me feel small, and you pushed me away. You were punishing a ghost by hurting a real person with real feelings. You could have told me back then and avoided all of this...”
“All of this what?” he asks, his voice breaking.
“Heartbreak.” I can barely say the word.
“I get it,” Lincoln says. “I used to be able to shut away every one of these goddamn feelings, but you’ve ruined that. You’ve fucking ruined it. Now I feel everything, and I hate it.”
“You hate what you feel for me?”
“No,” he says, running his hands through his hair in frustration. “That’s not what I meant. But I hate that you’re so important to me—that you’ve always been so important to me. What happens when you leave me? When you leave us?”
Silence fills the room as we stare at each other. He has so much fear and anger in his eyes. From behind me, I hear Trey take a shaky breath. I sit back slowly and glance between them.
“You’re going to get that internship,” Link says, his voice low. “Because you’re fucking smart and a damn good writer.”
“But that’s just for the summer—” Trey starts.
“Is it? Because the version of Charlie in her screenplay goes to NYU.”
I stare at him sadly. “I don’t know what my plans are, Link. Are you asking me if I applied to transfer to New York? Yes, I did, okay? I did it at the start of the year before either of you were even on my radar. My stepdad abandoned me, and my brothers have their own lives. I wanted to get the hell out of here because I. Had. Nothing.”
I suddenly feel exhausted, the emotional turmoil inside me is so heavy. “What do you want from me?”
