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“Of course. I understand.”
My dignity is shot as I carefully make my way out of the room. The thud of my forearm crutches on the wood flooring sounds over loud as it marks my unsteady progress. But it’s not loud enough to cover up Blaire’s mother’s voice.
“Blaire, whatever are you doing with a man like that! What will people think?”
Pausing in the hall, I can’t help straining my ears to hear Blaire speak up and clarify our relationship. All the while, a part of me wants to wheel around and snap about her mother’s lack of manners.
None of those things happen, and I head upstairs and quickly pull the rest of my clothes on before I return to the office.
Blaire’s face is flushed pink, and she breaks off whatever she was saying as I stop in the entranceway.
Propping my shoulder against the doorframe in what I hope is a casual manner, and disguises how much I currently need the support it offers; I ignore her mother and address Blaire. “I’ll see you later at work.”
Giving a jerky nod, Blaire hurries over to me. I lean down to kiss her, but she turns her face away and my lips graze the softness of her cheek.
Her green eyes are large and pained as she stares up at me. “Sorry, Lee,” she whispers.
“Me too,” I mutter, not exactly sure what she’s apologizing for, but knowing I’ve messed up in a lot of ways.
Not only tonight but since the moment I selfishly needed more than what she could comfortably offer.
CHAPTER TWELVE
BLAIRE
At work, things are strained between Lee and me, and I know it’s all my fault. I should have dealt with my mother and then talked with him. Explained exactly what he was getting into having a relationship with me. And then he would be out that door so fast.
Not that I could blame him.
Everything in me aches. I don’t want that. For the first time in a very long time, I know exactly what, or rather who, I want.
I want Lee. Arm crutches, glower, and all.
As if my thoughts summoned him, Lee comes out of his office, his face tight as he slowly moves toward the conference room. His crutch snags on one of the legs of Jim’s empty desk and time slows as I watch Lee stumble. My breath hitches in my chest and I’m halfway out of my chair even as he catches and rightens himself.
I’m at his side in a flash, my hands going to him, unable to resist my need to touch him and assure myself that he’s alright.
He jerks away and I’m left looking like I’m trying to hold up an invisible wall. Much like the wall that’s currently between us and getting thicker with every passing second.
“I’m fine,” he mutters, moving around me with far less grace than he normally exhibits.
“Lee, why don’t you sit down?”
Pausing, his brows scrunch heavily over his pale blue eyes, and I can almost hear the grinding of his teeth as he snarls, “I said I was fine. I don’t need anyone hovering over me and acting like I’m useless.”
My lips quiver as angry tears well up. “I never said that!”
His shoulders round as his face relaxes. “Look, I’m sorry. I’m used to managing things on my own. A little near miss isn’t a big deal.”
He takes half a step forward, a determined tilt to his jaw as he stares down at me. “Blaire, you and me, we’re both used to doing things on our own. It’s better not having to count on and be let down by others.” Sadness tinges his words, making me want to sob in frustration, even while acknowledging the truth of his words.
Haven’t I thought the same thing again and again when dealing with my mother?
But I’ve hurt Lee. By keeping him out and locking away my reasons for putting distance between us, I’ve hurt him as surely as others have.
As much as my own fears and actions have hurt me.
Funny how I’ve been trying to protect myself and, in the end, have been my greatest enemy.
