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“I’m so fucking sorry, Clara,” I whisper. I wish she could feel how every fiber of my being pushes into that one sentence. “I’m sorry, and I won’t stop making it up to you. Ever.”
I gently lift the thick curtain of her hair from her shoulder and sweep it over the other. She’s pure silk and satin, soft and luxurious and everything I could ever dream of.
I don’t deserve her. At all.
But damn it, I can try to be the man thatshedeserves.
I smooth my hands down her arms to lace my fingers with hers. My thumbs rub over her soft skin and I can’t stop burying my face in her neck. If this is the last night I get with her, I want to sear every single second to memory. Every smell, every touch, every taste, every sight. I want to drown my senses in her until all that’s left is an imprint so deep, I’ll never be able to sleep with anyone else.
The sudden thought of anyone else sharing my bed turns my stomach. It’s her or no one for me.
But if I’m going to prove my point, I have to give her the choice.
“This,” I murmur against her shoulder, “isn’t a transaction. Your body isn’t some currency to be traded. You don’t have to give yourself to me, or anyone, just to keep yourself and your daughter safe.”
Clara bites the corner of her lip for a moment, her brow returning to that confused frown as before. “I don’t understand. Are you getting rid of me?”
“No! No. God, baby, never.” I nuzzle the curve of her neck. “What I’m saying is, it’s your choice. It’s always been your choice. Sexisn’t meant to be a bargaining chip or a means for survival. And I don’t want you to feel like that’s all you’re good for.”
Her eyes widen a fraction. She stares out at the ocean. I wonder if the reality is crashing down on her like the glowing waves are crashing on the shore. I don’t push her to reveal her thoughts; I get the feeling I’ve done enough to last us a long while.
“So…” She sighs and turns her head to look at me. “What if I just… want… you?” Her gaze is low, like she’s too afraid to look at me.
As if I’d ever reject her.
“Hm.” I pretend to give it some thought, even though I already know the answer. “I think I might be able to help with that.”
Her mouth curves up in a shy little smile. “And if I just want to walk away? Do my own thing?”
“I’ll suffer the worst case of blue balls in human history. But I’ll manage.”
That makes her giggle. She contemplates it, then nudges me gently with her elbow. “And what if I want something in-between? Like… sleeping next to you. Fully clothed.”
I chuckle. “If that’s what you want.”
“What doyouwant?”
I trace the edges of each fingernail with my thumbs, one after the other. It’s not that I don’t know the answer—I just don’t know how to wrap it up in simple words. “I want…”
Clara turns in my lap a bit more. “Yes?”
Her guileless eyes blink up at me and I’m ready to drown in their depths. “I want you to want me. To want this. Us. Not because you’re afraid of losing something or afraid of upsetting me or because you feel like you owe me.”
I wrap my arms around her tighter as I whisper words that scare me shitless but I know she deserves to hear.
“I want you. I want this connection with you. I want to worship every inch of your body and remind you every single day how incredible you are. I want to brand every part of you with me until you can’t even remember that other fucker’s name. I want you to come to me when you want me, when you need me, and I want you to trust that I will do everything in my power to lay the world at your feet.”
Tears trickle down her face. I kiss them away one by one. She shivers and more tears spill, but I know it’s the kind of release she’s been needing her entire life.
“I want you to scream my name when I’m giving you the pleasure you crave. I want you to cry because you’re so damn happy that it’s all you can do.” I press my brow to hers. “I want a thousand nights just like this one—but only because it’s what you want, too.”
Clara nods. Then she nods some more, laughing through her tears. “I want that. I want all of it, with you.”
This time, there’s more in the kiss than just comfort and desire. It’s an oath, a promise, and a surrender.
I ease us to our knees on the bed, untangling our legs and fingers so I can caress her body the way she truly deserves to be caressed. My palms slide down her torso and spend time massaging over her womb. The fleeting thought of her growingmy child makes me instantly harder than I ever thought possible over something like that.
The desire only grows hotter when I slide a hand between her legs and gently stroke her swollen lips there. I can feel my seed slowly drip from her slit andfuck, does that rip a growl of possession from my chest without warning.
