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In my peripheral vision, I see her turn her head to look at me.
“Our relationship is a messy one,” I say, not sure I can stop myself from where this is headed. Kellan already told her. I know it’s not a competition, but I don’t like holding back now that one of us has made the leap. “God, Thelia, we hurt you so badly, and I’m so sorry. But we’ve gotten to the point we’re at, and I’ll never stop being grateful for that.”
Athelia goes stiff. I rub my thumb back and forth on her thigh, hoping to soothe her.
“I’ve thought about you every day since the moment I laid eyes on you,” I go on. “I know we still haven’t fully made up for what we did to you, but I promise we will. I want to. Ineedto, Thelia, because I love you. I can’t stand the fact that I caused you pain.”
When Athelia sniffles, I glance at her again, only to see tears streaming down her cheeks.
“Thelia—”
“I love you, too,” she says. Her voice is wobbly, and her fingers are wrapped so tightly around mine that it’s painful.
We’re about to pass an exit on the interstate, but I take it and pull into a gas station just off the road. The second the car is in park, I jump out and sprint to the passenger side.
Athelia is full-on sobbing by the time I’m opening her door and pulling her out and into my arms. She holds onto me tightly as she cries.
Doubt creeps into my mind—not of what she said, but of my timing. She’s seemed off all day, and she obviously has a lot weighing on her right now. Maybe I should’ve waited.
“I—I’m sorry,” she says.
“Don’t apologize.” I smooth a hand over her hair and smile down at her. “You’re allowed to feel whatever you need to.”
Athelia’s eyes scrunch shut, and she buries her face in my chest. As she sobs, a few people give us lingering looks, so I glare back at them. It does the trick and makes them hurry away, ducking their heads to avoid my gaze. Athelia doesn’t need people staring at her right now.
“I should’ve waited to tell you,” I murmur. “I’m sorry, baby.”
For some reason, that only makes Athelia cry harder. She clings to my soaked hoodie as she tries to collect herself.
“Hey, it’s okay. Just let it out. I’m here.”
“It’s just too much,” she sobs. “I don’t know what to feel, or—or what to think.”
“I know.”
“I wish the last three years were different,” she mumbles.
“I know. So do I.”
We would’ve cherished her—given her everything she wanted. We would’veprotectedher, dammit. But instead, we turned into the monsters lurking in the shadows, waiting for the perfect opportunity to play with our prey before we devoured her whole.
It takes Athelia a couple more minutes to calm herself down. Eventually, she wipes at her cheeks with the sleeve of her jacket. Her eyes are red and still glassy, but she seems a little better.
“Can you not tell Wes or Kellan about this?” Athelia says in between sniffles. “I trust you to let me wait to talk about this until I’m ready, but they’ll try to force it out of me.”
“Of course, baby. I’ve got you. I always will.”
Her wince is barely perceptible. I’m not sure what it means, but it only makes me worry more.
“Thelia—”
“Thank you,” she says shakily before clasping my hand in hers. “Let’s just forget about this for now, okay? I can’t think about it.” She pauses, biting her lip, before saying, “Not the part about me saying I love you, though. Never forget that.”
I smile, kissing her on the cheek tenderly. “I couldn’t, Thelia. Not in a million years.”
Chapter Forty-Nine
Athelia
