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My chest feels tight, like something is pressing against it, threatening to crush me. I got my revenge. This is exactly what I wanted—to make them feel the way they made me feel.
So why am I heartbroken?
I never wanted them to hurt themselves.
“I…” Kellan stops and takes a deep breath. “Is this what we put you through? This level of depression?”
I turn my head so I’m looking out the window. Why is he asking that now?
“Before,” he says, “I thought I got it. When you said you were suicidal, I thought I fully grasped what you meant. But this… God, Thelia, I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. We’re all hurting, but Cal… he’s almost unrecognizable.”
I close my eyes and lean my head against the window. The glass is cool, and I try to focus on that instead of my growing worry for Cal.
“Thelia. Is that how we made you feel?”
“Yes,” I whisper.
Kellan doesn’t speak after that, and neither do I. There’s too much to say but no right way to say it.
The drive back to Pemberton is the longest four hours of my life.
. . .
“He’s probably sleeping,” Kellan says as he unlocks and opens the front door quietly. “If you want, you can sleep in my bed, and I can crash on the couch down here.”
“I’m not stealing your bed from you.”
As I step inside, an unexpected feeling settles over me. Being back in this house feels strangely like coming home. I’ve missed it here. I’ve missedthem.
Kellan shuts the door behind us. “I don’t mind, Thelia. I’m the one who dragged you all the way out here in the middle of the night.”
“Is my couch still in my room?”
“We haven’t touched it.”
“Then I’ll sleep—”
“What the fuck is she doing here?”
Wes’s voice startles me, and my gaze snaps to where he’s standing at the top of the stairs. His glare is murderous, and with his arms crossed, he looks every bit as intimidating as he actually is.
“She can help him,” Kellan says.
“No. She’ll only break him more. Get her out of here before he hears her voice.”
“He’s still awake?” Kellan asks.
“He’s been in and out. We’ve been talking.”
Hope fills my heart. There’s no way I’ll be able to sleep without seeing him first.
“I don’t want to break him,” I say.
Wes clenches his jaw. Seeing him again brings so many feelings to the forefront of my mind. I want to touch him, to be wrapped up in his arms again and feel his lips against mine. But at the same time, I want to recoil and hide behind Kellan to shield myself from the way Wes is looking at me.
Why do I always have to be at war with myself?
“Something needs to change.” Kellan crosses his arms and matches Wes’s glare. “We can’t watch Cal around the clock. Give her a chance.”
