Page 42 of Regaining Integrity


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My eyes start to fill with stinging tears.

You’re being stupid, Angelica.

“L-Listen,” I start when he places me on the chilled seat of his four-wheeler. “You don’t have to leave your friends and family. I’ll walk back to my truck—”

“Stop it, Angelica.” It doesn’t sting when he uses my full first name. I’ve grown so used to everyone calling me just Angie; only my mom, grandma, or Lorelei call me Angelica. It’s nice on his lips. “I’m not taking you back to your truck for you to run away from me.”

“Then—”

“Scoot back,” he commands as he gets on in front of me. I don’t want to press my body against his, but the slight chill in the air changes my mind. I don’t wrap my arms around him though. We take off to a destination only he’s aware of, and my nerves start to take hold of me again because he has decided to go quiet.

I watch from over my shoulder as the bonfire disappears behind us. We aren’t going in the direction of his home and my truck. Instead, we’re headed deeper into the interior of his family’s ranch until he stops us in the middle of an open field. The quarter moon is the only light source when he shuts off the four-wheeler, and its lights go off.

Nothing deters my attention when he turns and takes a seat again, pointing in my direction.

His deep breathing is hypnotizing and arousing. I wish I could control my body’s reaction to him, to stop my nipples from tightening into hardened buds, but as much as I don’t want my body to feel this way against his, I don’t want it to stop either.

His head falls forward to rest against mine. “Saying I’m sorry doesn’t feel like it’ll ever be enough.”

I wasn’t expecting him to say something so heartfelt. Something funny, smart, and slightly annoying is more of Chase’s style.

“I don’t deserve to breathe the same air as you or even be near you after the shit I pulled on you.” Our eyes focus on one another in the dim light.

The remorse filling his face baffles me.

“Are you just going to stare at me, or are you going to say something?” He isn’t annoyed, but I know it’s putting him on edge that I haven’t said anything since he took off.

Scooting closer to him, I don’t say a single word. Once more, his heat is next to me, slowly seeping through every hyperaware part of me. He doesn’t move except for the hairs on his arms lifting.

I forgave him when he came to my classroom and made me dinner without expecting to have sex after. That’s why I tenderly press my lips to the vein on his throat, my nimble fingers crawling up to rake through the steadily growing hair at the back of his head.

“Angie.” His plea falls when I courageously seal my lips to his.

White-hot passion, hotter than the fire we were just by, flares around us as he accepts my kiss. My mouth opens, mirroring his own; our tongues spear, tangle, and dance together as we grab each other’s clothing.

The cool fall air is banished as our jackets are placed behind me, and Chase lays me out on the seat of the four-wheeler. I open my jeans; his rough hands grab my ass as his lips bruise mine.

“Are you sure?” He pulls away, working his own jeans down to free his erect dick. It bobs with the sway of the four-wheeler. I lick my dry lips, my eyes saying everything I want to tell him.

Nodding, he produces a condom from his back pocket. I don’t think of how he always seems to have one on him or how many girls he may have already taken out on a four-wheeler like this because right now, it’s just the two of us.

His thumb slides down to stroke my clit.

“Oh.” My back falls to the seat, the cool, worn material of the seat causes my back to arch.

“You’re so wet, Angie,” he murmurs, coming back down to cover me, and his breath fans against my cheek. A single finger slides into me briefly before slipping back out, causing him to hiss and me to writhe. “God, you’re tight.” I can’t get my mouth to close. I want him to fill me again. I don’t care which part of him does the job.

“Chase,” I whine, not caring if it’s a bad or good one either. I want him.

“I’m right here, baby,” he promises with a kiss.

“Then fuck me,” I pant.

“No,” he retorts.

My head lifts off the cushion of our jackets as his body heat leaves my chest. “N-No?” Just having sex with him isn’t at all like Lorelei tried to convince me of. I feel like it’ll be the end of me if I don’t have him.

“I won’t do that to you, not tonight.” The head of his erection presses at my pussy. “Not after remembering the past. I don’t want this forgotten.”

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