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I’m thankful for the distraction. Thoughts of Miles haunt me in my sleep, replacing Grant, but I’ve been able to get some rest because there is never violence. And adding in seeing my therapist, I think I’m already coming a long way in such a short time.
You’re kidding yourself.
In this little house I have all to myself is where I belong.
Also in Miles’s arms.
“No.” Dropping the sponge into the sink filled with dishwater, I brace myself against the counter. “I will not think of him.”
I don’t belong anywhere other than where I am right now.
I finally took a step to further my independence. No matter how concerned my mom is for me living on my own, it’s something I needed to do.
Since yesterday afternoon, when I waved Carter away, I have felt something ominous surrounding me. It’s as if there are hidden cameras everywhere I go, but when I quickly and discreetly look around, I find nothing.
I’m alone.
Maybe that’s my problem.
“That isn’t it.” The pain in my chest has morphed into a constant discomfort. When Rylie asked how I was doing, and I explained to her the pain she was trying to tell me I was suffering from wasn’t what I was dealing with, she too became more concerned.
I was supposed to call the doctor’s office today, but nothing seemed to go my way.
It all started this morning when I was too nauseous to eat anything more than two pieces of buttered toast for breakfast, only to throw them up in the wastebasket in the boardroom during our monthly meeting. I fled the room with the basket, feeling guilty and uncomfortable. I ended up cleaning it in thejanitor’s closet because I didn’t want to leave that mess for someone else.
I had two clients at odds with how we would proceed with their cases. Both were supposed to be straightforward custody cases. I’ve done so much of them lately that they’re routine, but they weren’t happy with the results they were fine with weeks ago.
Lunch consisted of a banana and Greek yogurt I somehow managed to keep down despite my stomach churning the rest of the afternoon. Dinner was a bowl of homemade chicken noodle soup. That still hasn’t helped.
Finishing my dishes, I make my way over to the massive chair I couldn’t help testing out when Carter helped me move it yesterday. It is, by far, the most comfortable thing I have ever put my butt on. I don’t have cable or streaming up yet, and I’m fine without it. I’ve always found something of interest to watch onNetflixor myPrimeaccount, but tonight, I want to enjoy the steady pattering of the rain on the tin roof and read.
When I was in college, every waking hour was devoted to reading a textbook and, later, the law books my professors required of me. The moment I had my certificate in hand, I spent a gift card from my parents on books I could read for enjoyment. My paperback collection is nothing compared to my digital one, but tonight, I’m settling on a well-loved paperback.
As I get into the story of two lovers working through the newness of their relationship while he protects her from the harm of something unknown while also holding the peace of the city, I can’t help but think of Miles.
The hero always wears a crisp suit and is Russian, but some part of how he protects his woman reminds me of Miles. Not even in the strong arms of my dad have I felt as safe as Ido when I’m in Miles’s. And safety is something that is far more important to me than anything else. He could have a messed-up back that causes him to walk with a hunch and be missing most of his teeth. As long as I feel safe with him, it doesn’t matter.
Being around Carter and, yes, Mason as well, has helped me move past the whole fear of werewolves. It’s the factor, also known as Thea, who I can’t seem to wrap my head around. Mason was kind enough to offer up the fact that Miles was some sort of country playboy and would have women popping up all the time, but his eyes would only be on me.
I’m still struggling to believe that.
What if he’s speaking the truth, and Miles is hurting for me just as much as I am for him?
Not that I can truly bring myself to admit that.
Looking down at my book, I don’t even know where I’m at. As much as I love this story, I can’t bring myself to get past the first page of the chapter. Half a page and my thoughts are wandering elsewhere once more.
With a deep sigh, I place my bookmark in the crease and close the book. The dim light of the lamp behind me doesn’t cause a glare to reflect off the window next to me as I look out. The rain pelts against the glass, making it look like I’m inside a waterfall.
Cuddling deeper into the chair, I pull my legs higher and cover my mouth with a hand while watching it rain. I was looking forward to opening some windows and airing the house out. The downside to finding a place so quickly is it smells like an old lady in here who had one too many cats.
Maybe that’s what’s causing my stomach issues?
I listen to the crackle and boom of lightning and thunder around me when a clash of light fills my windows, and I scream.
For a nanosecond, the lightning lit up the sky to reveal a silhouette of a massive form filling the window next to me before the thunder follows and the darkness returns.
My blanket and book clatter to the floor as I rush to the window to close the curtain and then make sure not only the front door is locked but the back as well before I grab my phone and rush into my room.
