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Benji joins us after a few minutes to grab a drink but ends up staying when he hears what we’re talking about. He’s thrilled I applied for the urgent care job near the lodge. Both guys are. My heart warms at the genuine friendships I’m forming with these two. It’s a brief respite from the disappointment across the room. And for the moment, their reaction to the news overshadows Zane’s lackluster response to the possibility.
I laugh when Benji tells a joke. We take another shot and then another.
An hour later, we still haven’t moved from our spot at the bar, and I’m feeling no pain. I forget to look over in the corner the more I imbibe. I forget the sting of rejection sitting there, just waiting to consume the pieces of me that are left.
My bladder is about to burst, so I walk to the bathroom. Benji finally heads back over to resume his game of pool.
I use the restroom and wash my hands, laughing bitterly when I see the familiar flush of alcohol coloring my cheeks. I try not to think too hard, convinced that I can continue to outrun my demons if I can just keep moving. With liquid courage coursing through my veins, I feel like I can conquer the world—or that’s what I keep repeating in my head. Even if every single word is a lie.
I push through the door but stop short when I see Zane waiting for me in the hall. I give him a cool, measured look and attempt to walk around him. He grabs my arm, stopping me. I bristle at his touch.
“What do you want?” I spit, my eyes narrowed into fiery slits. It’s harder to pretend with him standing before me. “There really isn’t anything to say. You’ve made your point tonight, Zane. I got the message, loud and clear.”
“And what message is that?” he challenges.
I can smell the liquor and beer on his breath.
“You’re trying to hurt me. Well … mission accomplished.” I glance down the hall so he can’t see my wounded eyes, and I try to stay angry. “I get it. Everything you said and everything we did together meant nothing.”
I mean nothing to you.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice is low and menacing.
“Tell you what?” I jerk my arm from his grasp.
“Tell me about Dr. Cooper and you.”
My eyes shoot to his in surprise.What does he know? Has the news followed me seven hours up the highway?
I expect the irritation and annoyance I see when our gazes connect. The accusations. But I’m surprised when I see the hurt lying there too.
“What are you talking about?”
We move apart to let someone pass, but neither of us leaves the narrow hallway.
“I’m talking about you. Ron Cooper. The affair you had with him.”
I’m struck speechless momentarily.
There were plenty of rumors circulating about Dr. Cooper. And, yes, some of them involved me. Most of them probably never reached my ears. But word of his current affair spread quickly through the medical field and beyond. It takes my brain a moment to catch up to Zane’s statement and realize that he thinks I had an affair with Dr. Cooper.
“I never had an affair with him,” I finally say.
Not a physical one at least.
Zane scoffs in disbelief, and my hands fist at my sides. I don’t have much steady ground left to stand on, but I still have the facts. And the fact is, I never slept with Dr. Cooper. I never let him touch me, and I never touched him.
“I know you did, Willow. Just admit it.”
Willow. Not Lo. He never calls me Willow.
I tilt my head as I study him. There’s fire blazing from his dark eyes. He’s angry and more than ready to paint the scarlet A across my chest. And it dawns on me that he might want this to be true. It would provide a reason for him to bail. An easy out.
“If I had, would that make this easier for you?”
His brow furrows. “Make what easier?”
“Make it easier for you to push me away.” I glance down the hall as Jessica passes by. She’s too focused on work to notice us standing here. “That’s what this is, right?”
