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“Fast. I went and talked to my counselor as well. Just needed to hash out some things from a non-biased point of view. How’d your appointment go?”
“It went okay. I’m not used to the whole counselor stuff yet. I’ve told him some things, but I just can’t bear my entire soul to him. It’s too weird.”
“I understand. It took me a long time to get used to it, too.” She leaned over the table and kissed him, down to his jawline before she sat back down. “I just needed to do that. Your lips are looking delicious.”
“Everything on you looks delicious.” He laughed. “But I can’t let you distract me. There’s a time and a place. Let’s talk about Mitch. What do you think we should do?”
“Have you ever heard of interventions?”
“Like the TV show?”
She nodded and patted his hand. “Sort of. We can do it that way. But who would you want there? It has to be the people he trusts. Your mom?”
“No. I wouldn’t even be able to be in the same room with her. She’ll make me relapse. It wouldn’t be good for me. And I know this is for him, but honestly, I think she’d be toxic for him too, though he has visited her far more than I ever have or am willing to.”
“Okay. No mom. That’s just fine. So basically, we’d meet with him. We’d talk about how his choices are affecting his life, how they’re affecting your life, and how you’d love for him to get clean.”
Michael tapped his finger on the table, considering it all from his point of view. How would he feel if people came to him, telling him those things? While using, he’d have been pissed. He would’ve felt attacked and likely would’ve stormed from the room like so many of the people on the show would do. Now that he was sober, he could see the benefits.
“I’m not sure Mitch will go for it.”
“What are you not sure about?” Haize played with the foil packaging from the contraceptive she had just taken. “And I’m not questioning you because I don’t believe you. Your feelings are valid, and I want to hear your side. I’m just curious.”
“Think about when you were using, Haize. Think about someone coming to you and talking about those things. How would it make you feel?”
She glanced up, eyes set hard on him. She was in professional mode, and she was damn good at what she did. “It did happen to me. My family had an intervention to open my eyes and allow me to see what was going on. When I was using, those things never occurred to me. It helped me gain perspective on all the bad choices I was making.”
“Wow. So, it worked on you?”
“It did. And I’ll be honest, at first, I was mad. It was my aunt who led it. Just like you and Mitch, I don’t have a whole lot of family, so it was a small meeting. I wanted to leave. I felt betrayed. But my aunt was very convincing. She’s the only one who ever truly cared for me. I did it for her. I couldn’t stand seeing her cry.”
Michael sat up in his seat, reaching out to hold her hand. “Can I ask you something really personal?”
She smiled as a single tear fell down her cheek, which she quickly wiped away. “Mikey, I think we are long past worrying about being too personal with each other, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, you’re right.” He took a deep breath, holding her smooth palm against his. “Have you relapsed?”
“Yes.” No hesitation, her eyes on him again, straight and to the point. “I’m not saying this to discourage you, Mikey, but it’s not if you relapse, it’s when you relapse.”
Her words sent a shiver down his spine. He had heard that many times. He’d read about it. And he was hoping to be one to defeat the odds. “How soon after you got sober did you relapse?” He wasn’t sure why the conversation had transitioned to her when they should have been planning about Mitch, but it flowed, and he went with it.
“Six months. Almost to the day.”
“What happened?”
She intertwined her fingers in his. “My stepdad. Well, not him directly. I had met a man. Thought I liked him. We were alone and he started putting his hands on me. Feeling me up, kissing me, slipping his hand into my pants.”
Michael felt his anger boil and he didn’t even know the man. It was in the past, and he still felt an immediate urge to protect her. Swallowing, he leaned closer, wanting to hold her. “You don’t have to continue to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“No, it’s fine. This was a long time ago. I told him to stop. I shut down. Told him no. But he kept on. I froze and laid back, letting him have his way while I was terrified. I left his place when he was done and went straight to the bar. Downed shot after shot. Woke up in a jail cell hours later, hating myself, fearing I’d never get back on track.”
“Have I made you feel that way?”
Her facial expression changed immediately, eyes widening as she shook her head. “No. Never. I want to be with you. I can’t stand it when we’re apart. I’ve never frozen up with you, Mikey.”
“If you ever need me to stop, just say the words. I never want to make you feel that way.”
“There’s something special about you. I’ve never felt dirty or used. I never think about my stepdad like I have with so many other men. You’re different, and not once have you ever made me feel those emotions.”
