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I don’t know how she and Dad have done it. For the most part, the parade of public figures, acquaintances, and friends have directed their attention to my parents, allowing me to stand silently for the agonizing formality of properly grieving Ben’s death. As a political family, it’s what’s expected of us. I’m just grateful that no one’s made me say much of anything so far.
“Will you join us for dinner?” Dad offers, making my stomach lurch.
Please say no.
“You’re too kind,” Mikhail says. “But I couldn’t possibly impose. I’m sure you and your daughter need family time.”
“It wouldn’t be an imposition at all,” Mom assures him. “Besides, Ben considered you like family, which means we do too.”
Mikhail presses a hand to his chest, indicating how honored he is by her statement. “In that case, I would love to join you.”
I bite back my sarcastic remark as Mom looks the happiest she’s seemed in days.
“Great. Why don’t you three head into the dining room, and I’ll heat up some more casserole? I hope you don’t mind, Mikhail. We have enough in our freezer to last us a century.”
“I’m not picky,” he assures her with a congenial smile.
As Mom turns toward the kitchen, Dad gestures for Mikhail to lead the way.
I grip my dad’s arm as soon as Mikhail turns to leave the room, and Dad pauses, his eyebrows raising as he waits patiently for the reason why I held him back.
“What’s up, pumpkin?” Dad asks when I flounder, unsure of where to start.
My parents have clearly spent time with Mikhail since I left home, and I find myself thrown off balance at seeing them greet him with open arms as they did. I have to warn my dad about who Mikhail really is, but I need to do so delicately.
I can’t say anything outright against him because he’s connected to Ben, who my parents have been very touchy about mentioning beyond what’s absolutely necessary. I think the pain of facing the reality of why Ben died is too great for either of them.
“Dad, I just… I have a bad feeling about Mikhail,” I hedge, worried I’ll say too much.
My dad chuckles, quirking an eyebrow. “Don’t be silly, Dani. I can assure you, he’s a good man.”
Hardly. Maybe I should have started with what Mikhail did to me. But I don’t want to push my dad too far. I know everything that’s happened with Ben has left my dad balancing on the edge of a knife healthwise. Telling him that Ben’s boss tried to force himself on me might be the thing that launches my dad into another episode.
And I can’t lose him too. Not now.
But I’m desperate to give him some kind of warning. Before I can think through exactly what I want to tell him, words come spilling out of me. “I just worry because I was thinking… Well, I wonder if he might not have… influenced Ben in a way that we haven’t really realized. You know, with the bar fight and the gun and all? It seems like a lot of Ben’s troubling behavior started after he went to work for Mikhail.”
My stomach knots as I stumble through my explanation, uncertain of how to say what I need to say without making it sound like a wild accusation.
“I know you’re looking for someone to blame for what happened to Ben, Dani. And I appreciate your concern. But you have nothing to worry about when it comes to Mikhail. He’s a solid businessman who I have gotten to know well over the past few months. I trust him and believe he did everything in his power to try and help Ben. We’ve had many discussions on the matter while you haven’t been around.”
The comment is slight, but it still cuts me to the quick, a note that I abandoned my parents, leaving them to worry about Ben and me at the same time while I was so adamant about rebelling against them.
“But—”
“Besides,” my dad continues, cutting me off. “Mikhail has proven himself a loyal supporter of my hard-on-crime policies, so he couldn’t have been the one encouraging Ben’s behavior. And he’s deeply invested in my election campaign. He’s all but ensured I’ll win the governorship. Then, we can get serious about ending the gun violence that’s been consuming New York’s streets for too long.”
I don’t know what to say after that. At a complete loss for words, I open my mouth but remain silent. My dad’s too far in over his head and doesn’t even realize it. How much money does Mikhail have invested in my dad? It terrifies me to think his career depends on a man who could be such a cruel, calculating monster.
“Everything alright out here?” Mikhail asks, reappearing in the dining room doorway and offering us a smooth smile.
“Of course. Sorry, Mikhail. That was incredibly rude of us. Dani just needed to speak with me for a moment.”
“No need to apologize. I’m the one who dropped by unannounced right before dinnertime.” He gives me a subtle nod as if to beg my pardon.
“Dani, will you come help me, please?” Mom calls from the kitchen.
“Excuse me.” Turning away from the sleazy older businessman, I scamper toward the kitchen, grateful for a reason to escape.
