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I hear their concern; I can’t see a way out of the darkness swallowing me whole. The people in my life that used to bring me joy now hold a malevolence—Efrem, Pyotr, even Silvia. And with Ben gone, somehow, my art feels meaningless. I’ve tried to pull myself together—for Ben’s sake, to live because he can’t. But after weeks of trying to find a purpose for my life, I’m just not sure I’ll find one.
“We just don’t want to lose you,” Mom says gently. “We’ve already lost one child. And it’s obvious you’re not recovering from Ben’s death.”
“What we’re trying to say is that we think it’s time for you to get out of the house, to find something to revitalize you. Maybe some fresh air and good company, a new friend, would do you some good.” Dad smiles encouragingly.
“If you’re hinting at me spending more time with Adam Page or something, I’m not interested,” I state flatly, sensing the underlying motive beneath my dad’s gentle nudge.
“Adam Page? No, no. He’s a good enough kid, but he’s not mature enough for you,” Dad insists, and I relax a little, relieved that I must have read him wrong.
“Mikhail Sidorov, on the other hand, is a respected businessman, a gentleman, and someone we would consider both worthy of your attention and a good place to start if you wanted to… get back on the relationship horse, so to speak,” Mom says brazenly.
“What?” I must have heard her wrong.
“I know it can be hard to think about love again when the person you cared for winds up being such a bad person, but I don’t want you to lose hope, honey. There are good men out there. You just have such an open heart. You don’t want to believe something bad about everyone,” she explains, her face sympathetic.
“The relationship horse?” I ask, dumbfounded by her statement.
“Yeah, only… maybe this time, you’ll be more open to our advice,” Dad hedges. “But in that regard, if you were interested in someone like Mikhail…”
“Why in god’s name would I be interested in Mikhail?” I demand.
“Well, he’s approached us about the idea of dating you. I know he cares for you and would like to spend more time getting to know you. And I think it would be a good idea,” Dad says, a rare smile stretching across his lips.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” I snap, jumping up from my chair.
“Danielle, language!” Mom gasps, her face appalled.
“No, seriously. As far as I’m concerned, Mikhail is just as bad as Pyotr Veles. In my eyes, he as good as killed my brother, your son.” The words gush from me in a torrent before I have time to censor them or consider how wise they are. I’ve been keeping my opinions of Mikhail under lock and key around my dad because I know how he feels, and I don’t want to give him a heart attack.
But now that they’re out, I can’t seem to stop.
“Mikhail took Ben under his wing, which put Ben in danger. He’s not innocent in all the violence going on around the Veles Bratva, you know. He might like to pretend like he’s separate from those unsavory friends Ben was spending time with before he died, but if you want the truth of the matter, Mikhail Sidorov is the one puppeteering all their rash displays of violence. They’re organized, a Russian mafia, just like the Veles, and he’s at their head.”
The room falls deathly silent as I stand, fists clenched, breathing heavily as I finally unload my burden on my parents. And now that I’ve said it, I know I can’t take it back. I only hope I didn’t just give my dad an aneurysm.
But the utter calm with which my dad speaks next chills me to the bone. “I think it’s too little too late for you to be saying something like that, Dani. Our families are now tied—publicly—and my campaign rides on the funds Mikhail has invested in this election.”
My stomach knots, and for a split second, I wonder if this is all my fault. If I should have tried saying something to my parents sooner. If my silence has, in fact, completely compromised my dad’s run for governor.
Then a darker truth slowly sinks in.
Because he didn’t even flinch when I told him Mikhail was in charge of the Bratva that Ben fell in with.
My father might not be as in the dark as I thought.
In fact, he doesn’t seem at all surprised by my revelation.
“You knew,” I breathe, horrified as I voice the ugly truth. “Did you cut some kind of deal with Mikhail?” I ask, clarity coming to me in an instant.
Ben was harping about how Mikhail intended to clean up the streets of New York, and my brother had intended to help him. He introduced Mikhail to my dad. Of course, Mikhail has been pouring honeyed poison in my dad’s ear. Wouldn’t it look so good if Dad could rid the city of an infamously brutal Bratva within months of becoming governor?
And in the back of my mind, I think about how smug Mikhail had been that night he lured me into his club. He would have known he could get away with targeting the Veles family if he’d already struck a deal with my father.
The stony silence my dad delivers in response is all the answer I need. My dad, the man I’ve always considered entirely incorruptible, has made a deal with the devil.
“I can’t believe you,” I murmur, swallowing hard to try and remove the knot from my throat. Turning, I start to leave the room, too horrified to look my father in the eye.
“Dani…” he says.
