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We’ve lived like queens, and I can’t say I regret any of it.
Spending nights by myself should feel normal; I’ve done it for long enough. But every night, I dream about Lukas and being in his arms.
I remember how good it felt, how he smelled, how his hand caressed me in his sleep like I was something precious to him.
He texted me when he got back, and we’ve exchanged a little bit of banter back and forth, then he said he was going out of town again.
Busy guy.
I still can’t shake the feeling that he’s back in the big city, and he’s back to being Mr. CEO.
A pit of dread hits my stomach as I unlock my apartment and set about unpacking my case, hauling all my clothes to the washing machine.
I take a long, hot shower and make some instant noodles for dinner since I don’t have any food.
Nothing spells a fall from grace like pouring hot water into a mug of noodles and calling it a meal.
A short time later, the doorbell rings, and I’m faced with a large bouquet of pink roses.
My heart leaps in my chest as I thank the delivery guy and shut the door, hunting around for the card.
Welcome home, Ariana. Thinking of you. Mr. Bx
I stare at the card and my heart tries not to do little flips in my chest.
Of course, I overanalyze it.Thinking of me?
I try to send something back a million times before settling on;
Thank you for the flowers. They are beautiful x
I see the grey bubble of him replying, then it disappears again.
No more messages come through, and I spend the next few hours looking at all the photos Charlize sends me from our trip.
They’re right. I do look glowy; happy. And we look like we’re having a blast.
I miss Mexico already.
I miss him.
I throw myself into work after the weekend is out and make sure I don’t have any spare moments to mope in my post Mr. Bentley haze. He also doesn’t message me all week.
I feel like I’ve been hit with a cold blast of reality.
I don’t even know how I am going to possibly look at another man again and not think about the hot, kinky sex, and the connection me and Lukas have. I just don’t see how it’s possible.
Of course, like usual, Charlize sniffs the truth out of me over drinks after work on Friday.
“I think you need to move on from this. If the stupid dick face hasn’t beaten your door down since you got back, then he’s clearly deranged.”
I smile into my drink. “Trust you to be the voice of reason.”
She shrugs. “Well, it’s only the truth. You don’t need a man, Ari. You need a champion. And you’d be shortchanging yourself if you took anything less.”
I laugh. “And here I am paying for a therapist when I could have been getting my help for free.”
“Laugh all you want, but I’m serious. There’s plenty more fish in the sea, Ari. You just need to spread your wings.”
