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“Good luck.” Sori squeezes my hand again and then lets go as I stand up on wooden legs. I’d completely forgotten that she was even holding my hand.
Having everyone’s attention completely on me now is unnerving. Especially when Cole, the man who’d sat next to Sori, shoots one glance in my direction and then dismisses me completely. My mortification is complete, and I lick my lips as I stiffly walk up to the designated area. I’m trying to remember to breathe, managing it pretty well, I think. Until I look up at Judge Carter and everything goes fuzzy for a second.
The table in front of me offers a little reprieve when I lean against it to take a few deep breaths.
“Breathe,” Sori calls out quietly. How I hear her from across the room, I don’t freaking know. Somehow her words make it through my head, over the sound of my racing heart, and I do.
The bailiff says something to the judge about my ticket. I assume it is the details of what happened, but I can’t quite focus on him. I’m too busy recovering from the mini panic attack that has taken over.
“Ms. Townsend.”
I look up to see the judge staring down at me dispassionately. “You’re here to contest your parking ticket.”
“N-no, Your Honor.” I swallow. “I was in the wrong. I just hoped that I could explain to you what the circumstances were of the incident.”
From behind me, there is a snort. “Pretty girls always get out of tickets.” I don’t have to turn around to know who it is coming from.Cole. Even when I get angry at the fact that he thinks I’m trying to get out of a ticket, which I am, he has no right to assume I am using my looks to do so.
“You parked illegally in an ambulance bay,” Judge Carter says disapprovingly. “What possible reason could you have for doing that?”
Sandpaper.
My throat is coated in sandpaper, and there is nothing for me to drink to make it better. There’s nothing to take away the aching sting of shame as I struggle to force the words out.
But I have to.
Not only don’t I have the money for the outrageous ticket, but itwasan emergency.
I swallow, grimacing at the way the saliva burns, but I have to tell him.
“My sister,” I croak. “My sister was in a car accident, and at the time that it happened, I was just outside the city for a conference. See, I’m a teacher, and every year we have to take continuing education. This year, I was lucky that it was there. It was only an hour away.” My breath catches. “Instead of the usual ten it would have taken to get here from Maine. They needed us here, at the hospital with her.” I break down as I say the words out loud for the first time and to a roomful of strangers, at that.
“Go on.” Judge Carter’s voice has changed, but I can’t see the expression on his face through my tears.
“I didn’t make it in time.” Sobbing, I keep going. “I thought I would make it in time. But I… I didn’t. And I parked there because I needed to get inside, to try and make it in time, and Cassie… died.”
I don’t want to say the words. I can’t say the words. Just like I can’t save Cassie, and I can’t stop the tears from flowing down my face in what has to be the most embarrassing situation ever.
A small tap on my shoulder has me whipping my head around. Only to see those unnerving green eyes staring at me with a handkerchief held out. “Here.” He presses it into my hand and then walks away without looking back.
Numbly, I take it and try to wipe the tears from my face. It buys me a few seconds, at least, before I have to turn back to face the judge. At this point, I’m pretty certain the judge won’t lower the fine at all.
“Ms. Townsend,” Judge Carter says deeply. “Those bays are for emergency vehicles only. But what I’m piecing together from your story is that you were in the midst of an emergency yourself.” He glances to the side, and I swear he sniffles. “Sometimes this position is hard. Obeying the letter of the law versus the spirit of the law is a decision that isn’t easy. If I were to give you this fine, in its entirety, I would be obeying the letter of the law. However, the spirit of the law demands that I let you go with a warning.” He looks down at the papers on his desk. “I’m dismissing this ticket, Ms. Townsend. Try to have the clarity of mind, if you’re ever in this position again, to park in an actual parking space.”
I can’t speak, can’t do much of anything except nod. I hadn’t expected that, not even in the slightest. I’ve never even contested a ticket before. If my father had known about any of it, he’d have told me not to do it. People get tickets for a reason and I should use it as a lesson. It’s the same story that has repeated itself my entire life. Dad started out as a cop and ended up as the chief of police for our small town.
“Thank you,” I finally manage to say, remembering the manners that I’d grown up with. “I really, really appreciate it.”
Before I can step down, Judge Carter clears his throat. I look up to see compassion written all over his face.
“To badly misquote one of my granddaughter’s books, ‘You can find happiness even when life around you is dark, if you just remember to turn on the light.’ I just hope that through this trying time, you’re able to remember that.” He blushes, a spectacular shade of red climbing his cheeks as he says it, and I can’t help the small laugh that comes out.
“My students love that series, sir.”
Everything is fine after that until I get back to my seat to see that Cole is sitting in my spot, and the only other place open is his former seat, which I take with a huff and try not to glare at him.
“I’m so sorry,” Sori whispers. “He just sat there.”
“Thank you,” I whisper over her head to the man who is finally looking at me.
