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“Are you alright?” Mark asked.
She looked up at him. “I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “Are you?”
He frowned at her. “What do you mean?”
She rubbed her hands on her thighs. “Um. I don’t know. Are you mad?”
“About what?”
“I- I don’t- I mean…was that…cheating? Because you said she could do it. And I didn’t know, and I didn’t want to make anyone mad, and I didn’t know if I was allowed to say no, and-”
“Stop,” he ordered and sat down on the couch. “Pet, come here.”
She got up and stepped toward him. He pulled her into his lap. “Did you like it or not?” he asked.
Abby hesitated. She had no idea how to answer that. Would she have done it if she was out to lunch and a blonde sexbomb cornered her in the bathroom and said, “Kneel before me and fingerfuck me?” Probably not.
“Pet, stop thinking so much and tell me exactly what’s in your head right now.”
“I can’t tell if I liked it,” she said quickly. “I didn’t feel ….that thing that I feel when you make me do stuff.”
“What thing?”
“Like, I don’t know. Like there’s this thing in my stomach that flip flops every time you tell me to do something.”
“You get excited.”
“Yeah, but that’s such a….mundane word for it. It feels like more than just that. Because I’ve been excited before. I mean I’ve had orgasms. It’s not just being horny.”
He considered this, then nodded. “Okay. I don’t get a thrill from submitting because I’m not a sub, but I do get one when my submissive does what I ask her to do, so I think I understand. You didn’t feel any particular way about being dominated by Sabrina.”
“No. But I liked…what we did. I mean she’s pretty. Beautiful even. I haven’t seen that many gorgeous women close up like that.” She paused. “Poor choice of words.” Mark chuckled. “It was, I don’t know, new and different and interesting and exciting, just not in any of the ways that being with you is new and different and interesting and exciting. But I was kind of worried that you were mad. Because I couldn’t tell what you were thinking. You didn’t order me to do what she asked. You just…stepped aside almost and I didn’t know if you were pissed at me and just didn’t want to make a thing out of it in front of her.”
Mark shook his head. “She saw you looking at her when she mentioned her subs are female,” he told her. Abby stiffened. “Relax, pet. No punishment. I promise. She said you didn’t seem rude. You seemed…curious. And then embarrassed because she caught you being curious. She asked me if you’d been with other women.”
Abby blushed and looked away. “I- no. Not really.”
“But you’ve done something with another woman,” he surmised. “Or fantasized about them.”
“Just- just one really. In college, I had this friend. We got drunk and kissed at a party. I’d always thought she was pretty. It was nice. But she had a boyfriend and I don’t even really know if it could have been anything anyway. I mean women are okay. Sometimes some women click for me while most of them don’t. But I prefer men, so it wasn’t worth pursuing. Are you mad? It’s not like I’ve dated women or anything. It just happens sometimes that I’m attracted to one. You were so distant…”
“I’m not mad, pet. She asked me if she could explore your curiosity and I told her she could. She’s a lesbian and an experienced Domme. She knows homosexuality can be a hot-button issue for some people. That’s why I didn’t do or say anything to stop it or encourage it. I didn’t want you to feel like you had to do anything you weren’t comfortable doing just to please me and I didn’t want to stop you if you were interested in seeing where it led. I’m not mad as long as you don’t want to switch teams on me.”
She laughed. “No, I don’t.”
“And as for the cheating, I was there and I was watching, so no, it’s not cheating. But, pet, if you think you want to see if it leads anywhere, then you come to me and we’ll discuss it. Anything you do away from me that I don’t know about, whether it’s with a man or a woman, is cheating and I won’t tolerate it. And I don’t mean that as in I’ll get the cane. I mean it’s over. Period. BDSM is so far down the rabbit hole, trust-wise, that one serious fuckup is usually all it takes to break a relationship permanently. Lies can’t be tolerated. I would never cheat on you and expect the same amount of respect.”
She nodded. She could see exactly what he meant. This required so much more trust than anything she’d ever done before. It was exhilarating, but terrifying as hell And if someone lied and abused that trust, it would have serious consequences. She frowned as she remembered something. “Mark?” He looked at her. “What- what are we a long way off from?”
