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14
“Brinna,” Lucian said, his voice gentle, which was simultaneously comforting and unnerving.
Her skin was so hot. Everything was hot. It had been one thing to think it was a dream, to allow herself to let go so completely, but learning it had been real, that Lucian had experienced that secret side of her, again—it was mortifying.
“You shouldn’t feel that way,” he said.
“But I do.”
Lucian’s hands wrapped around her wrists, and he pulled her hands from her face. “Why?”
“I wouldn’t have done that in real life.”
One of his knuckles curled under her chin, forcing her to look up at him. Though it was a struggle to meet his gaze, she did. “Why?”
“It was a fantasy.”
“Yes.” He offered her an understanding smile. “It was.”
She remembered he’d been just as into it as she had.
“And so what?” he said. “It also happened to be real—which neither of us could have predicted.” His eyes searched her face, settling on her lips for a heartbeat before jumping back to her eyes. “Was it so bad?”
Her first impulse was to lie in order to protect herself, his prior behavior making her feel insecure and somehow less-than. Only in their last several interactions, that hadn’t been how he’d treated her. He’d been patient and kind, protective and honest, which made him worthy of her trust. What then, exactly, was she protecting herself from?
So instead of lying, she said, “No. It wasn’t.”
Her heart was in her throat at the admission.
He swallowed, and she watched his throat work, before he cleared it and plucked a pink blossom from her shoulder, twirling it between his fingers. “We can just keep thinking it was a dream.” He glanced at her lips again, then looked away, dropping the blossom and taking a step away from her. “If it makes you feel better.” He swiped his hands on his trousers.
She looked away, trying to ignore the disappointment coursing through her at his dismissal. But then, he seemed to be wanting to make her feel more comfortable. And that was… that was… she wasn’t sure. She thought that would be what she wanted, but realizing it was real, ignited something new inside of her when it came to Lucian, a spark she wanted to feed.
An awkward silence stretched between them.
“If everyone’s asleep,” Luc said, breaking the silence, “are you able to dream share with your family?” He changed the subject, as if it were somehow safer.
Except Brinna couldn’t forget that they were there together and that the dream had been real.
“Maybe your mother will give you answers about how to break the spell? If she really did this?” His voice brought her back to the topic.
Another door slammed.
Fear grabbed hold of Brinna’s heart, and she clamped a hand around Lucian’s. “Not yet. Please.”
His golden eyes gave her comfort, his hand squeezing hers. “I’m not going anywhere. And if I do, you have my word, Brinna, I’ll find you.”
She tried to reconcile that with what she’d always thought of Lucian. “But you’ve always run from me.”
His mouth opened, his eyes just as wide, before he shut his mouth and shook his head, his eyes dropping so his lashes fanned his cheeks. When he looked at her again, his gaze was steady and sure. “You have my word.”
As he said it, the magical glen melted away until they were standing in a glass skyway of Sol, between the atrium and one of the wings. The deep blue sky was streaked with pinks as the sun rose.
“I’m sorry. I’m just afraid,” she admitted, surprised at herself. She’d rarely offered unfiltered truths to Lucian, and now couldn’t seem to stop.
He drew her into his embrace, and she relaxed against him, letting his strong arms make her feel safe. “We both know that I won’t remain asleep, but I promise you, Brinna, I will return to you.”
“I hate being afraid?—”
