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‘You didn’t. I offered.’ His arm brushes against mine. ‘How about you take me up on it?’
And so I do, grateful not just for Jack’s company, but for his understanding of what’s happening. After he drives me to the hospital, he waits in the car while I go to find Marnie in intensive care, where the gravity of her condition hits me all over again. Some of her hair has been shaved off, and there are traces of blood on her skin. Surrounded by the whir of electronic equipment, she’s sleepy, but peaceful.
‘Hello.’ I say it quietly, taking her hand, relieved that this part at least is behind her. ‘It’s over. You’ve been amazing…’ I whisper. ‘Before you know it, you’re going to be out of here.’ I watch her lashes flutter. ‘When you come home, I know you have Forrest, but you’re coming to stay with us for a few days. It was Birdy’s idea,’ I say softly. ‘You won’t be alone. We’re going to look after you.’
Her lashes flutter again, her fingers moving slightly.
I don’t stay long. I simply wanted her to know that I’d been here. That in a world where for too long she’s had no-one, she has someone.
But seeing her is sobering and as Jack drives home, I gaze out of the window, lost in my thoughts. It’s a beautiful evening, the distant sea glistening in the sunlight. But I can’t shake the image of Marnie in ICU. I have no idea how long she’s going to be in hospital, or how long it will take her to recover from surgery. That’s without considering what happens when she gets the biopsy results.
‘Are you OK?’ Jack glances at me.
‘Just thinking.’ I pause. ‘About a lot of things.’
‘Hardly surprising,’ he says gently. ‘But at least this part’s behind her – and that’s a major step.’
I sigh. ‘You’re right. I just wish it were the end of it.’
‘I know.’ His voice is filled with sympathy. ‘But there’s nothing you can do about that.’ Then he says something completely random. ‘Do you by any chance like goats?’
Taken completely by surprise, an hour later, I find myself standing in Jack’s garden leaning over the fence meeting Bella and Jojo, not at all sure what I’m doing here.
‘I was going to ask you, why goats. But now I’ve met them, I get it!’ Bella, the mother, reaches her head up and touches my cheek with her lips.
He laughs. ‘Don’t let Jojo do that – sometimes he nips.’
As if to prove a point, Jojo angles his head through the fence and grabs at my jeans with his teeth. ‘Ow!’
‘He’s only a baby really.’ Jack gently pulls Jojo’s ears.
I stroke Bella’s nose. ‘So how come you have them?’
Jack’s face clouds over. ‘I found them through a mate – he has an animal sanctuary and it’s always full. I happened to be there the day these two came in. They were rescued from a commercial goat farm. They got lucky – usually the babies are taken from their mothers as soon as they’re born. Their sole purpose is to keep the mothers producing milk. As for the babies themselves… The girls experience the same fate as their mothers, while the boys are no more than a by-product.’
‘No.’ I’m silent, horrified. ‘So if they hadn’t been rescued…’
‘Jojo would have been taken away from Bella. Then, chances are, he would have been killed.’
Looking at them, I feel sick. Here and now, I make a vow to never buy anything related to goat’s milk ever again. ‘I didn’t know.’
‘You’re not alone. Most people are unaware of the reality behind the food they buy.’ Jack looks up, then glances across the garden. ‘Ah. Looks like you’re about to meet my neighbour.’
I watch the elderly woman making her way towards us across Jack’s garden. ‘I was about to feed them. I couldn’t remember if you were working or not,’ she calls out.
‘Not today – sorry, I completely forgot to let you know. Anyway, I’m glad you’re here. Gertie, this is Rae. She owns the bookshop in Arundel. Rae, this is Gertie.’
‘Hello.’ When I hold out my hand, she grasps it firmly in hers.
Gertie’s hair is white and windswept, her eyes a vivid blue. ‘Lovely to meet you, my dear.’ She turns her attention to the goats. ‘Sweet, aren’t they?’
‘Not so sweet when they climb the fence and eat everything in your garden,’ Jack says wryly, and as he glances around I notice the barren flowerbeds. ‘Like last weekend. That’s why I don’t have any.’
I discover that as well as being her neighbour, Jack rents his house from her; that they have this mutually beneficial arrangement. Friendship, too – with distance, while at the same time, they’re clearly there for each other, which given they both live alone, is kind of nice.
Gertie doesn’t stay long. ‘It was lovely meeting you, Rae. And nice to see Jack in the company of someone closer to his own age.’ She raises an eyebrow in Jack’s direction. ‘I hope I see you again, my dear.’
‘Typical Gertie,’ Jack says briefly as she walks away.
