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“Hello, Ms. Smithson,” she says without a hint of recognition, and I allow myself to relax a tiny bit. “I’m Officer Campbell. I have a few questions about the accident.”
“There’s not much to tell. I went hiking in the mountains. While I was driving home, a deer leaped onto the road and I swerved to avoid it. It was raining at the time, and I must have lost control of the truck.” That part is kinda blurry.
“You had a flashback a few minutes ago. Do you have them often?”
Define often.
My hand grips Troy’s, possibly cutting off his circulation. This isn’t something I really want to discuss with her or anyone else associated with a police department. So I just shrug, letting the vague response be my nonanswer. I still have flashbacks once or twice a week, which is an improvement.
“Is it possible you had a flashback while you were behind the wheel, and that’s what made you lose control of the truck?” There’s no hint of accusation in her tone, but I can’t help feeling that’s exactly what she’s doing. Accusing me of wrecking Troy’s truck because I had a flashback and not because of a deer.
“I didn’t have a flashback.” My voice sounds weary to my ears. Hopefully she doesn’t have many questions. I slowly blink, my eyelids weighing a ton. “I was fully aware of what was going on at the time of the accident. Like I said, I swerved to miss the deer.”
“It’s usually best that you don’t try to avoid hitting an animal on the road,” she tells me, her tone matter of fact. “Often the damage is greater when you try to swerve to avoid the animal than if you keep driving straight.”
I’m sure the animals who leap in front of vehicles would disagree.
I nod my response, my mind growing sluggish.
“Why didn’t you stay with the truck once you got out of it?” she asks. There’s no judgment on her face. Just curiosity as she tries to piece together what caused me to go deeper into the forest.
“I thought if I could find another way back to the road, I could flag down a car and get help. I was looking for a path when the storm worsened. So I took shelter there and passed out.”
I can’t remember the last time I felt this tired. I blink again, attempting to chase away the exhaustion. My eyelids are also sluggish, and it takes all my energy to pry my eyes open.
Even then, they aren’t fully wide.
“If you have any questions about the report,” the officer says, “please contact me.” She hands me her business card. It’s heavy. Surprisingly heavy. My hand falls to the bed and she leaves.
My thoughts grow fuzzier, and I’m floating, floating, floating.
“How’s she doing?” The quiet female voice breaks through the fog in my head.
“She’s still sleeping.” Troy. His words are hushed.
Other sounds slide into my thoughts. People talking. Their voices quickly fade away.
I slowly blink my eyes open, and it takes a moment for the fog in my head to dissipate and for my vision to clear.
Troy’s sitting by the bed. “Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.”
“How long have I been asleep?” Drowsiness gravels my voice.
“Just over two hours.
The nurse inspects the IV bag. “We’re moving you to your room now. It’s ready for you upstairs.”
The hospital smells that I was too sluggish to notice earlier are now strong. Too strong. Each one is linked to the last time I was in a hospital. The disinfectant odor mocks me. Reminds me of what it felt like to be treated like a rabid dog. They thought I was a killer. Someone unworthy of compassion or respect.
“No, I’m not staying here. I’m fine.” I tear the bedding off me and swing my legs to the side. But Troy puts his hand on my shoulder, pinning me in place.
“Weren’t you going to ask the physician to let me go home?” I say when it’s clear he’s not letting me leave. The aching sting of betrayal turns my tone quiet and rough.
“I was. But you fell asleep, and I didn’t want to leave you alone.”
“I just want to go home to my own bed. I don’t like hospitals.” I rub my wrist, the memory of the cold press of metal handcuffs on my skin still fresh.
“You don’t have to worry about the cost,” Troy says, apparently not getting the problem. “My company’s insurance plan will cover it.”
