AllFreeNovel
Share Us
July 1943
France
* * *
I awaken the next morning, tangled in the bed covers and Johann’s limbs. The heat of his body presses into me, and for a minute, I pretend there is no war going on beyond the blackout curtains. The world is silent other than the chirping of birds and Jacques moving around the kitchen, getting ready for his day.
A day fresh with new possibilities.
A day with the same fears that plagued us last night. As wonderful as it had been, nothing has changed when it comes to the state of the world. I might have realised I’m falling in love with Johann, but nothing has changed when it comes to Hitler.
If anything, my feelings for Johann make things more dangerous for us. My allegiances haven’t altered. My king and country and sister are still my top priorities.
The sleeping man next to me stirs, and his long dark eyelashes flutter open. “Bonjour.” He smiles at me, and my heart becomes buoyant.
I return the smile, mine shy and without a hint of remorse for what we did last night. “Bonjour.”
“I don’t suppose we can stay in bed all day and forget our real life?” Amusement lightens his tone, sending relief pulsing through me that he’s speaking in French and not English.
Maybe I didn’t cry out in my native tongue after all. While I have no doubt he suspects I have connections to the local resistance effort, he hasn’t pieced together that I am a spy. I want to keep it that way.
“Unfortunately not.” My words float out on a sigh. I close my eyes, attempting to block the memory of my nightmare and the last time I saw Pierre. A tear leaks free and drips onto my pillow at the loss of the man. At the loss of the friendship we’d shared.
Johann tightens his hold on me and kisses my brow. I open my eyes and see the adoration I feel for him mirrored back. A tiny part of me wonders if I’m imagining it, or if he’s playing me for a fool and will turn me over to the SS as soon as it benefits Hitler.
With Charles, I experienced moments of doubt late into our relationship when it came to his feelings for me. I ignored my gut when I should have listened to it. This time, my gut is silent. It’s the SOE agent, the woman who has been hurt by someone who once claimed he loved her, who is raising the question.
Johann gently presses his lips to mine. “Are you still willing to come to the grand ball with me? It is in two weeks.”
Something coils in my belly—either nervousness or excitement. But he is not taking me out on the town and courting me. He’s taking me into the pit of vipers where I might learn something valuable for Baker Street’s cause…or my identity might be unearthed. “I don’t have anything suitable to wear.”
A ball for a powerful party leader and his wife requires something fancier than anything I own in France. I have the money to procure such a dress on the black market, but if I buy one, it will only raise questions.
“I can get you a dress.”
“Are you sure you want me there?”
“You will be the only pleasant thing about the night.” He kisses me once more.
“I’ll be there.” As much as I would rather not be in the presence of some of the most evil monsters in the Reich, if it benefits the Allies, I will do it.
We reluctantly climb out of the narrow bed. Johann returns to his room, and I hurry to get dressed and go downstairs to make him his breakfast.
Johann enters the kitchen as I put his plate on the table. Food is in short supply for everyone, but the meal on the plate is still more than the average French citizen has available to eat.
He finishes his breakfast and carries his plate to the sink. I take it from him. The sound of crunching gravel draws close to the house. My stomach tightens as it always does at that noise. It means only one thing.
I walk Johann to the front door. He grabs me and pulls me to the wall beside the door. His mouth captures mine, and he kisses me with more passion than the earlier kisses this morning. We are not visible to anyone who might peer through a window. But what we’re doing—the kissing—is dangerous. What if we’re interrupted, if Jacques opens the door, not knowing we are here, and exposes us?
But even knowing that, I don’t push Johann away. I pull him closer to me, allowing him to temporarily distract me.
“How about we watch the sunset tonight?” he murmurs against my lips.
“I would like that.”
He leaves, and I wait until I’m positive the military Jeep is gone, then retrieve my bike from the barn.
I pedal into the village to queue for rations. The mood is normally sombre, even more so since the Germans moved here. But with the cloud of Pierre’s death hanging over us, the mood is more suffocating than soot.
