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Riley and Ethan were my friends from university. Riley was constantly on the prowl, never appearing to want to settle down. Ethan, however, was happily coupled up with Dave, who he’d met around the same time Leo and Ferry had started dating. I was amazed he was leaving him to come out with us, to be honest.
“You’re going to The Closet, right?”
I smiled at Ferry’s question. I didn’t know why he and Leo were so insistent on us going there. Maybe it was because they knew the owners. Mori and River were another set of Lucky’s brothers-in-law.
All of Lucky’s brothers-in-law were queer and coupled up with super-hot men.
Lucky himself had not one but two partners, and I’d never seen people as happy as their triad. I’d asked him once if they ever got jealous of each other. He’d laughed.
“No. If anything, if two of us are together without the third, it’s just…hot. Seeing Dimitri making Dagon happy makes me happy. And vice versa.”
It worked for them. I didn’t think it would for me though. I was secretly selfish—something I hid from everyone. I wanted to be the centre of someone’s universe. The sole person they loved and treasured above everyone…
My brain came to a screeching halt. No. That wasn’t what I wanted. Not anymore.
It’s not what I want. It’s not.
Looking for that had led me to men like the one I’d gone home with. It was too dangerous.
I realised belatedly that I hadn’t answered Ferry’s question. “Yes, we’re going to The Closet. I think Lucky’s going to try and join us too.”
Ferry’s shoulders visibly relaxed. “Fantastic. I’m sure you’ll have a great time. Just remember, if anyone gives any of you any trouble?—”
“We’re to let one of the staff know.” I reached over and patted his hand. “I know. But don’t worry. I’m sure that won’t happen. We’re just going to dance and have fun.”
Ferry disappeared off to shower, leaving me alone to set my cooling cake on the counter.
Yes. I was going to go out. Dance. Have fun.
And maybe tomorrow, I’d start the hunt for my stable man. My safe partner.
Then this loneliness would leave me alone, once and for all.
Caffeine Daydreams pumped from the club’s speakers. Ethan was on one side of me, Lucky on the other. My arms were in the air as we screamed our way through the bridge of “Tease.” Riley was with us, but he was thoroughly distracted by a bear who’d hit on him half an hour before.
Once upon a time, I wouldn’t have left the house wearing trousers as tight as these. I certainly wouldn’t have paired them with this sheer black tank or the pastel pink lace thong hidden under my trousers. Nor would I have felt confident enough stepping outside of my front door with winged eyeliner or the purple lipstick Riley had picked out for me.
But times were changing. Leo and my family had given me the confidence to embrace my true self. And here, in The Closet, I fit right in.
I’d found my place.
Riley finally came up for air, sauntering over while his dance partner watched on hungrily. “Right, I’m off.”
Panic rose in my chest, squeezing my ribs in a vice. “Now?”
Riley peered at me through his wide-rimmed lenses in confusion. On most people, the size of them would look ridiculous. But Riley pulled them off with ease. I didn’t know if it was his high cheekbones, strong Roman nose, or just his confidence. Whatever it was, Riley was working it. “Yes, now. I’ve pulled.”
He thumbed over his shoulder at the bear, who was surreptitiously rearranging himself, his gaze fixed firmly on Riley’s rear.
Memories of another man flashed through my mind. Another night in a club.
“Is that okay?” Riley’s confusion had morphed into concern. “I can stay if you like.”
He isn’t that man. That’s not what’s happening here.
“No, it’s fine.” I forced my smile back onto my face. “Lucky and Ethan are here. You should go.”
“Okay.” He went to turn, but I stopped him before I could help myself.
