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I wave my hand at him. “Yeah, just a long day. I'm gonna go for a bath, then have an early night.”
“Scar, I need to talk to you? Did you hear anything I just said?”
“Yeah.”
“Scar, I need you to sit back down.”
I sit back at the table.
“It's Ray.”
“I don’t want to talk about her. I'm still angry at her for everything she’s done. I’m not ready to forgive her yet. When she apologises, then I'll think about it.”
“Scarlett!” My dad shouts. My dad never shouts. My eyes shoot to him. “Scar, it's Ray… she’s gone.”
“I know, and she can stay gone till she wants to apologise. Then I will listen. Till then, Dad, I’m not interested.”
I push from my seat and head towards the bathroom. Clicking the door shut behind me, I can hear them talking. It sounds heated, but I don’t care. I don’t care about anything anymore. She did this to me: she draws you in and makes you think you’re her everything, then you do one thing she doesn’t like, and she tosses you aside. She hasn’t been anywhere near since she got out of hospital and made a mess of the club. She set it on fire. I mean, what kind of person does that to her family?
I can't get over the things she’s done. But what I can't get over really is the fact that I know none of it’s true, and I hate myself, so I’m manifesting it on her, and I can't bring myself to drop it and apologise because if it was me, if I screwed this up and hurt her, I know I can’t come back from that.
I sob as I slide down the door and crumple to the floor. I let it all out, and I break. It was me. I let her down. I thought the worst when I should have known better. She would never do the things she was accused of and she wouldn’t have hidden away while doing it, either. If she thought we deserved it, she would have shouted it from the rooftops while she destroyed us all. How could I have been swept so far off track that I betrayed and abandoned my sister, my heart and soul?
She’s the reason I’m still breathing. I need to make this right.
There's a knock on the door. “Scar, princess, can I come in?”
“Yeah.” I breathe on a stutter as I scoot away from the door, still crumpled on the floor.
“Princess.” The tone says it all as he bends down and scoops me into his arms, sliding his body under mine so I’m cradled against him in his lap, and I sob into his chest.
“It's my fault she’s gone.” I sob. “We always had each other's back, and the only time she’s ever truly needed me, I turned on her. I need to make it right. I need to see her. Can you help me?”
I feel him shaking his head against mine. “Princess, she’s gone, she’s dead. I'm so sorry we didn't get there in time.”
“You saw her…?”
“No. We followed her tracks to the edge of a cliff. She had taken her clothes off and spelt out K.F.D and underlined the D with sticks, then the footprints led to the end of the cliff, and there were some clothes in the water, she went over the edge, princess. I’m sorry.”
I scramble from his lap, slamming my back against the wall. “No, no, no, she wouldn't. She would never, not to herself.”
“Princess, it's not your fault. It's on us all. We all turned on her and let her down. We were all wrong!”
He stands and takes a step towards me, but I rush out of the door. Dad’s sat at the table, his head in his hands, sobbing into them as I rush into the room. “Dad, say it isn't true, she’s not, she wouldn't, you know she wouldn't. She wouldn't do that, she wouldn't, Dad. Please tell him, tell him it's not true, tell him, Dad. Tell him, tell him!”
My dad just shakes his head and cries into his hands, sobbing out, “She’s gone, Scarlett, it's too late!”
“No!” I bellow at him. “No!” I run out of the apartment and into the square, screaming at the top of my lungs as my legs give way. I crumple to the floor. She can’t be gone. She can’t leave me. I need her. I’ve always needed her. Everything’s so fucked up. I can’t go on without her. I can't.
I startle as arms wrap around me and lift me to my feet, my shaking legs barely supporting me. “It's okay, princess. I’ve got you. I will always have you.”
“But you're not her!”
“I know, princess, and I'm sorry, but I'm here, and I will always be here.”
I push at his chest. “You can't promise that; she promised that and left me. She chose to leave me. You can't promise that, no one can!” I push to leave, but he pulls me closer.
“Princess?”
