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Christ, I was fucked.
Now I was stuck deciding if I wanted to let my team down again or go after Sinclair. In my heart, the choice was an easy one; go after Sinclair. However, what would I say? What could I possibly say to her to make this right? According to Bernard, Cap had tried for a year and a half to win her back, and while I hadn’t cheated on her, I had attacked her character in the most brutal way. I had said shit that I couldn’t take back, words that were probably still living inside her head.
She’d been in love with Cap, had dated him for over a year, and she’d still had the strength to walk away from him. For a year and a half, she had resisted every gesture of regret and every word of remorse. She’d gone to the same campus as him, had seen him every day, and still hadn’t looked back. If I showed up at her place right now, she’d slam the door in my face, and why wouldn’t she?
It was also burned in my brain how she’d told me to leave and never contact her again. Knowing what I knew now, it was easy to see that she’d meant every word. I had probably taken her mind and heart back to her college days, re-erecting those walls around her heart. I had no doubt that she probably saw me as nothing more than another Cap Aldrich, and I deserved it.
“What’s up, folks?” We both looked up to see Claude walking into the locker room. “Ready to kick some ass?” He winked at me. “With the basketball, not our fists.”
I flipped him off, tapping down the turmoil rolling around in my chest. “Screw you, fucker.”
Claude grinned. “It’s all good, Knight.”
It really wasn’t.
“I’ll let you get in your zone,” Bernard offered as he went back to his locker, leaving me to wish that I could go back in time.
Instead of putting my earbuds in, I pulled my phone out, then texted Raven. While the others would know soon enough that I fucked up, Raven was the one that I needed advice from.
Me:I fucked up. She dated him back n college
Raven’s reply was immediate.
Raven:I can fly out 2night
Me:Not necessary. But I’ll call u after the game
Raven:I’ll b waiting
By the grace of God, we’d won and were still on our way to winning that back-to-back title that we were all gunning for. Still, the win hadn’t done anything for me. Normally, winning a game seeped into my veins, and I was as ramped up as the rest of the team after a win. The locker room was always a madhouse afterwards, but it was all nothing but white noise to me right now. I had only two days before we had to go out of town for another game, and it wasn’t nearly enough for the amount of begging that I had to do. I needed more time, even though I knew that it wouldn’t help me.
In fact, I was pretty sure that nothing could help me right now.
Chapter 24
Sinclair~
Five days later, I was still reeling from the trainwreck that had blown up in my face, and five days later, I was still very aware that I had no one to blame but myself. Nevertheless, working myself to death had been my chosen therapy, so that’s why I was leaving the facility so late.
Anything to keep my mind off my stupidity.
As my best friend, Harley had done his best to shoulder some of the blame, trying to convince me that I wasn’t stupid or a bad judge of character when it came to men. He’d also been smart enough not to advocate for the male point of view, which had helped. Nevertheless, the pain was still very real, my level of stupidity still very glaringly obvious.
Lugging my tote and purse, I locked up, then left the Coltrane building, ready to go home, take a hot bath, then do my best to get some sleep. I knew that I looked like shit because it was hard to hide dark circles unless you were a professional makeup artist, which I wasn’t. Besides, since I had no interest in men right now, who cared how I looked? I sure didn’t.
Exiting the building, I looked up to glance around the parking lot. Coltrane had night guards, but things weren’t that serious around here, so I was fine with them doing their rounds, instead of walking me out. The parking lot was lit up enough for me to feel safe enough without an escort.
However, as soon as I spotted my car, I saw a black Ferrari F8 Tributo Spider parked next to it, Orion Knight leaning up against the expensive sports car. Honestly, the only reason that I knew what type of car Orion drove was because I had asked him when he had picked me up for our first date.
Ignoring the erratic beating of my heart, I shifted my eyes back to my car, doing my best to act like Orion Knight didn’t exist. I wanted to go back to a time when he had never existed in my life. I wanted to go back to a place where he had never been a part of my life.
As soon as I approached my car, Orion was walking around the front, his hand already holding the car door open, stopping me from getting in. “C’mon, Sinclair.”
His voice almost brought tears to my eyes.
Luckily, my pride was stronger than my emotions, something that Cap Aldrich could attest to. “Let go,” I ordered, proud of my voice.
“I just want to talk,” he said, pissing me off.
