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“No, Mama,come!” Sofia insisted. “We’re makin’ a bloody curry over here!”
I snorted at the sound of Sofia using the word “bloody,” especially to describe curry. It wasn’t particularly appetizing, but it sounded adorable with her slight lisp.
“Be nice to Mummy,” Xavier told her. “Mum’s cooking something of her own over there. She doesn’t have to do anything she don’t want.” He swept out of the kitchen holding a wood spoon, looking adorably rumpled in a slightly stained button-down and a splotched apron tied around his trim waist.
He looked like a very happy mess.
I’d never been so attracted to anyone in my life.
“We could use a neutral third party,” Xavier said as he squatted next to me and held out the spoon. “Taste it, yeah?”
Unable to take my eyes from his blues flaring with humor and pride, I obediently opened my mouth and allowed him to slip the edge of the spoon between my lips. His eyes flashed a bit darker as I sucked the golden-brown liquid off the edge.
“Good?” he asked in a voice quite a bit lower than before.
It was better than good. It was stupidly delicious, spicy sunshine in a spoon.
I couldn’t help but crack a smile. “It’s outstanding.”
Xavier’s own grin splashed across his face with the brilliance of a summer sky, and my heart gave a few extra thumps.
“Good,” he said again, this time clearly satisfied. He chewed on his lower lip, almost shyly. “I like to see you happy.” Without waiting for a reply, he swept back up, spoon and all, returning to the kitchen like a conquering champion. “Good news, peanut—curry’s a winner!”
My heart, however, was completely at a loss.
I’d been denying it for nearly a month now, telling myself that everything between us was done for. But there was no use. With such a simple little transaction, everything that had been swimming under the surface for the last several weeks broke through with the force of a breaching humpback whale.
I was still desperately in love with Xavier Parker.
And I’d just told him yesterday that it wasn’t going anywhere. I’d broken his damn heart, and now I was breaking my own.
Quickly, I ran through all the reminders of Why It Was For The Best.
There was his horrible family, who, sure, weren’t exactly in the picture. For now. The way he was married to his job. Except for the fact that since he’d been here, he was back almost every night by five, often earlier. But that probably wouldn’t last.
And sure, he was in therapy. Sure, he was trying. But his anger management issues couldn’t fix themselves overnight, and how would I really know he was making improvement until something presented itself? How would I know the next outburst wasn’t just around the corner?
I was almost convinced until I looked up and caught him grinning at Sofia all over again. He glanced at me and winked. Actually winked. Surly, never-smiling, always broody Xavier winked at me and grinned like a black-haired ray of sunshine before turning back around to stir his pot.
As if he couldn’t help himself.
As if being here with us made him happy too.
And damned if I didn’t love his smile just as much as he seemed to adore mine.
I was almost ready to give up and join them when the doorbell rang.
Xavier glanced toward the door, brow adorably wrinkled. “You get more visitors these days than the queen, Ces.”
I snorted as I got up from the couch. “That’s rich coming from a duke who was buried in courtiers last August.”
“Courtiers are for court, not a bastard heir.”
“What’s a bastard, Dad?” Sofia asked.
“Er—” Xavier looked to me, obviously in need of help.
I sighed. “It’s a mean name for someone whose parents aren’t married, lovey. Daddy shouldn’t use it.”
