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“I don’t know how assholes like that sleep at night,” he shakes his head. “If we get anyone like that, we’re out the door,” he declares, and I try not to let the ‘we’ mentions give me the warm fuzzies.
At that moment I’m thankful that my phone buzzes in my hand bag, and I pull it out to find a text from Lizzie. Thankful for the distraction, I open it to see what she has to say and immediately regret it.
Lizzie:Colson Hawkins was in PORN!!
Lizzie: *screenshot of Colson Hawkins in movie still*
I feel the hot flush come up my neck to my face. I try to close out my messaging app when more movie stills come through at rapid fire.
Kasey:It’s probably photoshopped!
Lizzie:The hell it is! Look at his DICK!
I chance a quick glance over at Ben who thankfully seems oblivious to the fact I’m being assaulted with dick pics as I try again to close out my app, only to have more shots from this supposed porn movie come through, and dammit, they’re making the blood flow straight to my core. Perfect. I’m horny in a car with Ben, the forbidden fruit. Thank God she runs out of movie stills and switches to gifs, not that that helps.
Lizzie: *Colson Hawkins gif dripping wet*
Lizzie: *Colson Hawkins gif pulling shirt off*
Lizzie: *Colson Hawkins gif bedroom eyes*
Kasey: Lizzie…
Lizzie: *Colson Hawkins gif shirtless and winking*
Kasey: Lizzie! Are you trying to kill me?
Lizzie: If I have to see this, YOU DO TOO!!
Lizzie: *Colson Hawkins gif dancing on bar*
Lizzie: *Colson Hawkins gif shirtless and sweating*
Damn it all to hell. I give up on trying to close out of my messenger, and instead, silence my phone and throw it back in my bag, knowing when I get it back out later, the battery will be gasping for air and exploding with Colson propaganda.
And of course, when we get to the dealership, a salesman is on us so fast that I’ve barely gotten out of the car, let alone tamed my blush or my lady bits.
“Hi folks!” the man greets. “What are we looking for today? A family vehicle?”
Yay.
Ben
At first, I felt a little guilty, like I’d conned Kasey into doing this with me under the pretense that I needed her so that I could spend some more one-on-one time with her. Even so, I tried to ignore it and tell myself I really did need her along with me, and I feel somewhat validated as the experience has proved me right.
I’m actually not even sure what I’m looking for as far as features go. In my old life, I drove a sporty Acura, but I’m feeling like I’m over that kind of vehicle.
“I guess I’m going for practical,” I’d answered her. “A dependable SUV would do, I suppose.”
Having Kasey along has been a godsend as we test drove the newest Blazer and also a Silverado that Kasey got giddy over, stating she’d always wanted a pickup truck, but could never afford the insurance and gas they require. As we try out the vehicles, the salesman, Richard, seemed to shift his attention to Kasey shortly into the quest as she made exclamations like:
“Ooh, a sun roof! I’d kill for one of these.”
“Oh my gosh, XM radio comes with this one? That’s awesome! I love my music! I would love to not have to sit through commercials!”
“I drive an automatic right now, but manual transmissions are so much more fun!”
I’m getting to know so much about her today. She seems animated, and just liked I’d hoped, is talking enough for both of us while she and Richard get along famously, and I debate which vehicle I’ll buy to put his kids through college.
