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“Any Shade could kill Nik if that’s what you’re asking,” I replied with a smug smile of my own. Nikolai brought a hand to his forehead and slumped backward from his bruised ego. He peered through one eye to make sure I was smiling. I tossed a bit of rabbit at him.
“Do not waste the food,” Syrra cut in. Her voice was light, but her eyes were serious. Nikolai choked on his laugh.
“And me?” Riven asked. “Could a Shade take me down?” He was standing against one of the trees. His expression was playful, but his jaw was hard. In the firelight, his eyes were pools of mulberry flame watching my every move; my skin prickled under his gaze. I was beginning to enjoy the feeling of it.
“You would beat a Shade, maybe even two,” I said honestly. “If you ever get approached by three or more, I recommend you run. Fast.”
Riven let out a small laugh before grabbing his food. He never fed himself until everyone else had served themselves. Even me.
“How many Shades could you take on?” Syrra asked, grabbing another piece of rabbit.
“As many as I’ll have to,” I answered. Two Shades had already lost their lives because of our alliance. I wasn’t blind to the fact that many more would be killed before we reached the king. My only goal was to keep that total as low as possible.
Syrra gave me an understanding nod. I didn’t look to Riven but could feel him studying me from where he stood.
“That took a dark turn,” Nikolai said. He stretched along one side of the fire and kicked off his boots. “So, Keera, what’s the most impressive kill you’ve ever made?”
I scoffed. “That’s how you lighten the mood?”
Nikolai gave a lazy shrug. “As good a time as any. We all want to know.”
I laughed, but when I looked up, three pairs of eyes were staring back at me. Waiting.
“I took down a brumal bear once,” I offered. “With nothing but a broken arrow.”
“You’re lying,” Nikolai replied, tossing a rabbit bone into the fire. It hissed and cracked in the flames.
“Straight through the eye.” I unclipped the holster at my thigh and tossed it over to him. He gasped when he unsheathed it.
“Bloodsteel?” he asked in awe. He grazed his fingers along the dark red blade.
I nodded. “The damn bear broke the original hilt, so I replaced it with its bone.” Nikolai traced the outline of the white handle, focusing on where the blacksmith had carved a paw print into its base. He passed the blade to Syrra. Her gentle fingers studied it in delicate appreciation.
“Bears aside,” Nikolai said, his eyes lingering on the bloodsteel blade. “Who is your proudest kill?”
I froze. I wasn’t proud of any of my kills. Killing was something I had to do, something I was very good at doing. But it had never been something I took pride in. Gareth’s face flashed in my mind. I hadn’twantedto kill him. I regretted that I’dneededto. But there was no pride in that. No achievement or satisfaction. If anything, each one of my kills had chipped my pride away until there was nothing left. Until I felt less like a person and more like a killer. But that still hadn’t made me proud.
“I know it,” Riven whispered, pulling me from my thoughts. He had staked himself next to a tree, leaning on the wide trunk.
I looked up at him, confused.
“Last year in Silstra,” he started, walking closer to the fire. Closer to me.
He sat down beside my bedroll and poked the fire with a stick.
“A gang of traffickers had been rounding up Halflings,” he continued. “Taking them from the slums and whorehouses. There had been too many for anyone to stop them. No one wanted to risk their lives over a few Halflings.”
Eighteen Halflings, I thought.
“Keetes’s men?” Syrra cut in, her eyes wide in disbelief. “Sixty-fourmen were found hanging from the dams that night. You are saying it was all one person?” She looked at Riven.
He nodded.
“You?” Syrra asked, her eyes landing on me. “How did you do it? Find and move that many men in one night?”
I didn’t respond. It had been a long night, and in truth, I didn’t remember most of it. Just running, cloaked in darkness, taking the men one by one until they all were hanging from the canal walls. I threw the last of them over the edge just as the first sun was rising.
I had no idea how Riven had figured it out. I searched his face for answers, but he only shrugged.
