AllFreeNovel
Share Us
A heavy silence fell, then. Mostly because she was going through all the horrendous possibilities in her head. And if his expression was anything to go by, said possibilities were very horrendous indeed. He looked like they were punching him from the inside out. There was actual pain in his eyes.
Pain, and more terribly, hope.
Like he was willing her to go with whatever he was about to suggest.
Even though she already knew that wasn’t going to be a thing. She was sweating before he’d even said it. She had to wipe her palms on her thighs as she worked up to telling him to go ahead. And then she did, and still somehow got something she could never have imagined in her worst nightmares.
“We’re going to have to lean in to it,” he said.
Matter-of-factly, too.
As if it weren’t the most ridiculous thing ever to be spoken aloud.
“You’ve got to be having me on. Alfie, tell me you’re having me on.”
“I can’t, love. I wish I could, but there’s just nothing else to be done.”
“Of course there is,” she sighed. “And you can start by not going stark raving.”
“Oh, see, I knew you’d be like this. It’s why I didn’t say it in the car.”
“You thought this up in the car? You’ve had this in your head for hours?”
“I’ve had this in my head since I landed us in the shit. And believe me, I haven’t enjoyed it. But the simple truth is: it’s the only fucking option.”
She rubbed a hand over her face at that. Mostly to give herself a second to really think about what he was saying. To see if any part of it made sense. But nope. No. It truly and absolutely did not.
“Okay, so let’s just be clear on this,” she said. “What you’re proposing is that we pretend that we actually are a couple. Even though people are already finding it difficult to believe that we are a couple. And neither of us is good at being couples with anyone, even on our best days while with someone who adores us.”
“I’ve never been with anyone who adores me, so that hardly matters.”
“Okay, a) that’s not the point, and b) what the heck, Alfie, JesusChrist, is that true? Please tell me that’s not true. You were with that lass from that girl band, weren’t you, the redheaded one, she was mad for you, I’m sure she was.”
“She broke up with me because my laugh annoyed her.”
Immediately, she thought of him holding his amusement in.
Always, constantly, holding his amusement in.
Never going beyond a smile, or a spark in his eyes.
“Oh mygod, is that why you never laugh at anything now?” she asked, and the worst part was, he didn’t even fucking hesitate. He just plunged right into his answer as if it took no time at all to consider or admit. As if it were nothing.
“Yes. Yes, that is exactly why. Now please continue telling me how nobody is ever going to believe that a woman who barely tolerates my presence could ever be dating me.”
“I’m trying, but I’ve sort of forgotten how to say things.”
“Well, I don’t know why. You’ve seen what I’m like. It can’t be that wild to you that people find it hard to get on with me. That things about me annoy them. In fact, it’s weirder that you have trouble than me,” he said. Then he gestured and nodded in her direction as if she would somehow not know whom he meant. Or that she would try to deny it if he didn’t give it an underline.
And to be fair to him, he was right about that.
The first thing that popped into her head to say was this:
“Maybe I’m hard to get along with, too.”
Much to his disgruntlement.
“Like fuck you are. You’re the warmest chatterbox I’ve ever met.”
