AllFreeNovel
Share Us
In a rational capacity, I knew my guilt was a result of my upbringing. By building a family and loving someone, I wasn’t getting in the way of Mia’s love life or muddling Zach’s attempt at having his own family, nor was I turning Danny’s wife into a hateful person. I was still a work in progress, I knew I’d have to fight that sense of unworthiness from time to time.
But the question still nagged at me.
“Are you seeing someone?”
She was startled at my odd question. “Where is this coming from?”
“Don’t you wanna be in a relationship?”
She looked brokenheartedly at me. “You’re bored already, aren’t you? Is it because I’m better than you at Pictionary? Do you want to see other people?” She gasped. “Are the sparkles gone?”
“Come on, you little witch.” I poked her side, making her laugh. “I’m serious. I’ve never seen you with anyone. Not in a relationship capacity anyway.”
“I don’t know. I don’t think I’m exactly looking for someone.”
“Don’t you wanna find your better half?” I joked.
“That’s the thing. I’m already whole. I have two good halves.” She raised her free hand, its palm facing me, to better explain. “Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t mind finding someone who could add something good to my life, but I don’t need someone to complete me. Does that make sense?”
“I guess.” I bounced my head from side to side in thought. “Don’t you miss it, though?”
She thought for a while. “Sometimes. It’s not that easy, though. Especially considering what we do for a living. Most men are intimidated by that. Then they get intimidated by you and Zach. On that note, you’re really putting a damper on my sex life.”
“I never said sex life, I meant your love life.Love,” I emphasized.
“Oh, you’re so sweet. And naive.” She shook her head at me. “But they’re intimidated. I noticed from the few first dates I went on, that from the very beginning, they wanna control me. They’re not comfortable with a woman who does aman’s job.” She huffed again, rolling her eyes. “They seem to think I’m being braver than them or making more money. I don’t mean to sound conceited—”
I laughed at her worry. “Come on, Mia, I know you. You’re the farthest thing from conceited as you can be.”
“Thank you. It’s irking, really. Not only do they resent what I do for a living, they resent the men around me.”
“What do you mean?”
“They turn up their noses at my job, they try to diminish what I do so they can feel better about themselves. Then they meet you and Zach, or Danny and Dad, and instead of working on themselves to live up to what you all are, they make backhanded comments about you and me. Men claim to love independent women, as long as they’re not their women.” She snorted in all herladyness. “Dating is so fun.”
I laughed at her dry voice but considered what she was saying. It shouldn’t be this hard for her.
“If I’m supposed to be with someone,” she resumed, “I want a partner. A man to fight by my side, root for me, and respect my choices. Someone encouraging who understands my job is important to me, and so is my family. I know this might sound silly, but I want him, whoever he is, to get along with you, and to be a good fit for meandfor my family. Not someone who spends the better part of dinner time trying to make little of me and compete with the men in my life.”
She stared ahead again. “I look around me, and I see what I want. Look at Mom and Dad. After decades, they still love and respect each other. Then you have…well…” she cupped her hands around her mouth and whispered, “Zach and his love interest, who should remain unnamed.”
I chuckled at the worst-kept secret. “I wonder whom you’re talking about?”
She let out a light laugh. “You can’t deny he’s patient, though. The way he treats them is so beautiful.” I nodded in agreement. “And then there’s you.” She looked at me, smiling proudly.
“What about me?” I was a little afraid to ask, as I never expected to be a part of her relationship goals.
“Come on, look at how far you’ve come. You’re supportive of Izzie, you respect her fears, and you encourage her dreams. You went from running from anything resembling a relationship to running for Father Of The Year. You faced your deepest fears for them. And for you. Despite everything you thought you knew about yourself, you were brave enough to put in the effort to be better. Your journey is admirable, Benny.”
I’d never thought about it that way. I always felt like I was winging it, without a single clue as to how to navigate in such wild waters. But what I said to Izzie the other day was true—I had some really good examples of how to be a good partner. Hearing someone whose opinion I valued so much telling me I was doing a good job was humbling.
“Is it too much to ask? I just want someone to respect me...but who would also handcuff me to the bed every once in a while.”
“For God’s sake...”
“I wouldn’t mind some light spanking.”
“Please, stop.”
